With his 49th birthday fast approaching, Brad Harvey recently started thinking about his mortality. So with the help of a phalanx of lawyers, Brad wrote his last will and testament. EADJ was fortunate to get their hands on the actual document:
I, Brad Unicef Harvey, being of sound mind and body, do hereby bequeath the following:
To Ryan, my undying partner and friend, I leave both packets of ramen noodles in my cupboard.
To Todd, I leave a bottlecap that I've pinched so it's in the shape of a football.
To my friends at Reckless Records, I leave my automatic pencil. It's all out of lead, so you have to buy a refill at Office Depot. But first you should doublecheck to make sure that the lead is the right size for the pencil. I made that mistake once, and they were kind of dicks about me returning it after I opened it. I don't see what the big deal is, because all of the lead was still in there. They never even checked. Sometimes they're really unhelpful over there. Especially that guy Keith.
To Marshall, I leave an opened container of some pencil lead that I have no use for and couldn't return at Office Depot.
To Tom Lichtenheld, I leave my Listerine breath strip container that has a penny in it.
To Phil Flickinger, I leave all rights to the use of the phrase "Boo Ya!"
To BooBoo the Skizz, I leave my orthotic insole. I only had one, man, so just be thankful.
My Executor shall be authorized to carry out all provisions of this Will and pay my just debts, obligations and funeral expenses.
(pictured above, a sample of the Brad Harvey estate)
No comments:
Post a Comment