If ever there were a good time to be Joel, that time would be now.
Sony Music has asked Joel to write the liner notes for Fantasia Barrino's next album.
"The, ah, styre. And, ah, the humol which Joer uses in his writing has made him perfect candidate," said Sony's stereotypical Japanese and sometimes Chinese spokesman Takeshi Xiu, "We rike velly much Joer's writing in Wicked Wicked Games. Big Happy Fun Time Explosion!"
In addition to the Fantasia liner notes, Joel has also been asked to write a fax spam sheet and a sign for one of the broken copy machines.
"I'm thinking either 'COPIER DOWN' or 'OUT OF ORDER– PLEASE USE THE ONE ON THE 14TH FLOOR.'" said a clearly psyched Joel, on the assignment.
When asked about Joel's extracurricular activities of eating massive amounts of dick, Xiu had this to say:
"Why you think we hire him? We want our dick eated too!"
Then everyone at the press conference had a long, hearty laugh that froze when the credits started rolling.
(pictured above, will.i.am, apl.de.ap, Taboo, and Fergie say 'Fuck it.' And the inevitable fallout by the hipster crowd ensues)
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