CRAWLSPACE!!!!

My cousin Melissa and I were cleaning the basement in my house, and we found a CRAWLSPACE near the bathroom! Inside we found a bunch of treasures that were left by the previous owner, who you might remember left a ton of crap in the yard and an upstairs closet.

I let Melissa go in first, in case there were mummies or waterfalls like in "The Goonies."



The crawlspace had low head clearance (thus the name) and we found a shitty brass lamp, an unknown bracket, and what looked like a dusty tennis racket case.


We found an ancient mystical box that was labeled "Killauni."


No magical amulets or idols inside, though.


Although if the previous owner's motorcycle GPS goes haywire, he's screwed.


We found a perfectly good desk fan, which I gave to Melissa.


Then we found THIS:


Friggin' JACKPOT. A rusty fucking sword! This IS the Goonies!! We also spotted an unattractive flower vase and ignored it.


We cracked open the tennis racket case to see what was really in there.


It was a camping cot. Was someone actually sleeping in this crawlspace? Did this used to be some kind of sex dungeon? Was "Killauni" involved?


We also found a cassette tape, the contents of which I hope to digitize and post on this blog later. But after that whole abandoned film fiasco, let's not get our hopes up too much.


But even if it turns out to be a blank tape that was inexplicably left played in the middle, we'll always have THIS:


Lost Boys!!!!!