Fresh Direct Tuesday: Indian-Spiced Lentil & Quinoa Ragout w/ Roasted Vegetables, or Slumdog Millionaire, The Microwavable Dish

Our week of bad continues with a visit to the east: today we try some Indian food!


The kitchen on 21 was again empty, so there were plenty of entrées to choose from in the machine. Sweet. When it came to Indian, I had a choice between the Indian-Spiced Lentil & Quinoa Ragout w/ Roasted Vegetables or the Twix bar.


Same old drill as yesterday. 3 minutes. But as the 2 minute mark hit, there was a STRONG onion smell seeping out of the microwave. I felt really bad for the people who work in the nearby cubicles. I figured I should eat this thing outside.


I was pleasantly surprised that this time, the entrée wasn't almost 1000 calories. Way less sodium, too. You go, Fresh Direct East!


So I smelled up the elevator down to the lobby and sat outside with all the unhappy smokers. And this time, the six minutes it took going down there was enough to let the food cool off. So, yay for my mouth.



It was all neat, symmetrical, and orderly like a still life painting. But once I dug my fork in to get the lentils ragout underneath, it got ugly. A geiser of rank onion and garlic punched me in the nose and took my wallet. Imagine the crotch area of a fisherman's waders, then add some fermented onions and hobo fillings made of cheese, and you'll start to get a sense of how it smelled.


Okay. Truth be told, this wasn't that bad. Although it was pungent and sinus-clearing, the ragout, broccoli, chick peas, and carrots were tasty. I ate most of it, in fact. But I drew the line at essentially putting every bad-smelling vegetable in my mouth. That was she said.


The stench from the dish caused even the most die hard smokers to quit and go back inside, and some curious pigeons nearby wondered how they ended up in the local dump.


I tried sharing some of this delicious Fresh Direct food with my feathered friends:



Shortly after I turned the camera off, one of the pigeons said, "Dude, not cool."



So it wasn't a total culinary disaster like yesterday's Chicken and Cheese Cannelloni. But it did stink up the building, elevator, lobby, outdoor plaza, and adjacent Duane Reade store. Now when I get home the wife is going to think I fell in wet garbage again.

Overall rating: F