Wednesday, August 4, 2021

EADJ Cryptocurrency News!


EADJ has the latest cryptocurrency news, updates, values, prices, and more related to Bitcoin, Ethereum, Dogecoin, DeFi and NFTs, starting RIGHT NOW!!!!

• Bitcoin Miner XPORNSTARXCOREY8 has announced a merger with next door neighbor and best friend 69PENTHOUSEDUDExSOHUNG to pool their resources for a global operation, currently valued at ₿6.7 Trillion

• NFT update: the Pink Armadillo With A Party Hat NFT has plunged in value from ₿80 billion to only ₿4 billion because someone on SNL said the word "pink". Up to four dozen bitcoin trillionaires have lost their life savings.

• Federal Trade Commissioner Henry Pym has assured investors that bitcoin volatility has been stabilized after someone removed a leaf from the Wall Street ticker outside.

• Crypto-startup EXCELLENCE has successfully converted all of their company's assets into blockchain technology and have reduced their real-world footprint into a thumb drive that's around here somewhere...

• The following new bitcoin currencies have been announced as of four minutes ago:
    - Georgies
    - Porgies
    - Puddings
    - Pies
    - XTreme Savage Points
    - Marlboro Miles
    - Douches
    - Coaches

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