Wednesday, April 22, 2015

6 Lies Told By The Chuck E. Cheese Birthday Party Pamphlet

1) "Your birthday boy or girl can choose between a 'Superhero' or a 'Princess' theme package." There is actually a third, less popular option: "College Grad Moving Back Home."

2) If you choose the Batman superhero theme, Chuck E. Cheese will gladly murder your parents in the nearby alley.

3) Goody Bags are sometimes Averagey Bags, based on market

4) LOL

5) Punching out your birthday candles is not as effective as blowing them out but is doubly hilarious.

6) For an extra $50 off the books, most of the male managers will show fathers their tits.


EADJ is proud to announce the grand opening of 6 Lies Youth Centers all around the metropolitan area!

These "6LYC" centers are designed to provide a 24-hour relaxed, authority-free space for kids to smoke, to talk, and to smoke. Please keep in mind, there is no security guard on the premises after 2am, so if you want to show up and start some shit, you'll want to do it around 2:30am.

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