Monday, January 22, 2007

Eat 'Em and Weep.


Oh, Joel. You vex us, you inspire us, you frustrate us with your boundless dick eating. How can budding dick eaters hope to reach the heights (and lengths) that you have devoured in your 35 years on this earth?

"Baby steps," you always say with a sage nod, "Baby steps."

So to all you Joel wannabes: you'll want to start off slowly. Replace your regular side dish (mashed potatoes or greens) with dick. Then slowly work your way so that dick becomes the bigger portion of your meal. This transition from side dick to main dick usually takes 3 weeks. Joel made a chart for all you beginners, but he got it ruined at Kinko's when he tried to get it laminated.

(pictured above, Ryan finds a suitable Noel substitute.)

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