The ProofrEADJer: Early February Edition

An Imagined Conversation

"Okay, Crusader crew! Good work getting us through tech rehearsal today! We've blocked everything out, made proper adjustments to costume and backdrops, and have printed all the programs and tickets. Looks like we're ready to rock a Sunday premiere! Does anyone have any questions before we wrap it up for the night?"

*raises hand*

"Yes? Vance?"

"Don, is it a good idea to do this in the middle of a WORLDWIDE PANDEMIC?"

"Is what a good idea?"

"Is putting on a big expensive production with dozens of cast members and crew in a theatre full of hundreds of people a good idea in the middle of the Covid shutdown?"

"Well, we did budget for it last year."

"Yeah, but we didn't anticipate a full shutdown of society to prevent the spread of a deadly, untreatable disease whose method of transmission we don't even fully understand yet."

"Like I said, we did budget for it last year."

The ProofrEADJER: Mini March Edition

UAG

Dear Taco Bell, Samsung, Pioneer Stereo, Kia Motors, KFC, Miracle Whip, Skechers, Speed Stick, Boost Mobile, Fructis Shampoo, Ray Ban, JC Penney, Bridgestone Tires, Fandango and The Arizona Tourism Board:

It's 2012 (soon to be 2013), guys. Can we cut the crap with showing a group of young people riding around in a convertible as a symbol of "good times" and "freedom?" And not just any group of happy young people- a specifically multi-cultural group of happy young people. It is a tired, hackneyed cliché that needs to drive over the Grand Canyon wearing kerchiefs and holding hands. 

Now, what using this cliché in your commercials tells me is that not only are you unimaginative as an advertiser, you have such fear of offending anyone that you create this utopian bullshit peace-on-earth focus-group-generated gang of freshly-scrubbed teenagers, something I have yet to witness in my lifetime. It's actually more racist when you think about it. "Hey! Look how well the Asian guy gets along with the girl who's half black/half white!"

Also, a convertible? Every fucking time? I realize it makes it easier to shoot the entire group, but it's so weird to see something on TV so often THAT NEVER HAPPENS. Well, maybe in Santa Monica.

Bullshit.

Bullshit.

Bullshit.

You could almost take any of these stock photos, slap a random logo on it, and it would look like something you'd see on TV. That's a good idea. Let's try that now:

Man, advertising is easy.

The EADJ Crappinema Presents Incident On A Dark Street

Like many of the other DVDs by EastWestDVD, "Incident On a Dark Street" features a big star on its cover who is barely on screen for 15 minutes. But William Shatner takes that nugget of a role and soars with it, on wings of his magnificent 70's moustache.

"Incident On a Dark Street" was initially the dull story about the U.S. Department nailing the boss of a crime ring who's trying to silence all the squealers. But the director took that boring script and turned it into a full-blown boring TV movie. All in all, it's full of boring angles, pedantic dialogue, and Oh God, look at that moustache. That thing is exquisite.





























For more information on the "sturgeon face," click here.










Later, a couple cavorting under a dock(?) find a dead body. The performance by the woman was ALMOST "The Third Greatest Performance of All Time," but after careful review from the EADJ Board, it was only given an Honorary Mention.



Here is that performance:
















Overall Grade: F