Thursday, January 5, 2023

Upcoming Conspiracies For 2023 From InfoWars


Angry, gullible dumb guys have a lot to look forward to this new year. Here are some stories that Alex Jones and his writers are getting ready for them:

• Office Max is selling literal WOKE AGENDAS in their stationery section

• Since they have mostly voted Republican, Iowa voters will soon wake up with a free "Freedom iPad" under their pillow

• Some breeds of cat have the ability to walk on 5G frequencies to heaven to say hello to your Maw-maw

• When black people say the words "haunt me" really fast, it sounds like they're saying something else

• Events in history will now be referred as either "B.P.G" (before Pizzagate) or "A.P.G." (after Pizzagate)

• High blood pressure makes you smarter

• The band Paramore is pretty talented, but not as talented as Alter Bridge or Led Zeppelin

• Tim Pool has a beautiful, lush head of hair under that beanie cap

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