Wednesday, September 15, 2021

The Newest Hot Crowdfunding Projects on Kickstarter


Want to get on the ground floor of a potentially great new product? Or do you just like to fund something with no guarantees because you like to live dangerously? Well, here are the newest Kickstarters projects you can help fund:

•  Illustrated trading cards of your favorite local drug dealers with phone numbers

• A device that pops when you ask it nicely to pop

• Coupons for "giving a shit" that you can give to your relatives

• An ABS WASHBOARD. You've heard of washboard abs– well, this is an actual washboard with an AB texture on it! Hilarious, right? Hey, where you going?

• Nipple clamps that look like Arthur from the Nickelodeon show

• A VR headset that simulates you actually getting into a club for once

• Dog dildos. Not dildos for dogs, but dildos that are shaped like dogs. Never mind. The FBI is on their way.

• A hairdryer that tells you you're running late and have already missed 15 minutes of the goddamned recital, Samantha. Jesus.

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