Oh dear. "Secret Agent Club" isn't even Hulk Hogan's first foray into kid-friendly fare- he had already appeared in 1991's "Suburban Commando" and 1993's "Mr. Nanny." So he either loves working with kids or hates even numbers. Billed as "True Lies" meets "Home Alone," the 1996 film "Secret Agent Club" is more accurately described as "An Icepick To The Taint" meets "Getting Audited." How bad is it? I would rather watch all thirty Wrestlemania specials with lampreys attached to my nuts than endure this movie a second time. Truth.
Editor's note: To help spice up this Crappinema, I took the liberty of peppering this write-up with some goofy Hulk Hogan gifs. Collect all 8 for a chance to win a Secret Agent Club beach towel not really!
This is the actual, verbatim dialogue between Mr. Yamata and Jeremy in this scene:
Mr. Yamata: When your Mama die, very hard on your Papa. You think he not miss her as much as you?
Jeremy: He was never home, anyway. He was always off at some stupid toy convention. He wasn't even home when she died.
Mr. Yamata: Jeremy, he needs you now.
Jeremy: I don't think so.
Mr. Yamata: Well, you think again. He has no one else.
Overall grade: F
No comments:
Post a Comment