The EADJ Crappinuum has always been the most accurate way to gauge how bad a movie is. The mere fact that it appears on this measure indicates that it falls somewhere between "terrible" and "fucking piss-awful."
"The Suburbans" is one of those movies that leans a little more towards just "terrible" because of the following reasons:
• pretty good production values
• a discernible plot
• not terrible performances (except for the director/writer/main actor/caterer)
Everything else is a solid strike against the movie, from being unfunny, unconvincing, poorly paced, to worst of all, wasting the comedic talents of some solid stars. Oh, and a major strike for not getting Jennifer Love Hewitt to flash her snoobs.
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