Friday, August 19, 2011

We Meet Again, JOTB

So this morning I was downloading soundtracks from one of my favorite illegal websites, when I happened upon a title that still makes me cringe:



Both of you who follow EADJ on a regular basis might remember a movie with this title was reviewed in a 2009 Crappinema and has so far been considered the very worst movie of all the shitty movies we've reviewed.

But what's different here on this soundtrack is that it's an animated children's movie. And it's in 3-D!



The YouTube page for the trailer bills "Jock Of The Bushveld" as "South Africa's first 3-D Movie!" Wow! That's like Iceland's first bubble tea shop! Or Jamaica's first mortgage finance consulting firm! Where do I queue up?

Regardless of the fact that it's animated or has fancy depth, I'm going to assume this will be as excruciatingly boring as the live action movie I was subject to in 2009. A prospector befriends a dog. The dog dies. 120 min.

There is no way you can make that story last two hours and be enjoyable. And that includes throwing footage of Playboy Playmate Sara Jean Underwood eating penis-shaped popsicles in a cowgirl/cheerleader outfit made of cellophane. Besides, how appropriate for children would that be, really?

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