New Releases On The Documentary Channel

Entertainment, history, politics, the environment. Whatever subject interests you, The Documentary Channel is guaranteed to have a partially true documentary about it. Here are the newest releases this week for you to check out:

• Pancakes, Waffles or Crepes: A Breakfast Controversy

• Cesar Millan Gets Bitten

• Child Actors' Personal Assistants: Professional Masochists

• Every PEZ Dispenser-Related Death To Date

• Why Zeus Was Such A Man Ho

• Scurvy's Silver Lining

• The History of the NBA As Told By Wayne Gretzky

• DUMP!

Here Are A Few More Available But Horrible Porn Names

Great job, rookie, on deciding to join the porn film industry. But before you go before the cameras, you're going to have a porn name. So if you can't think of anything that hasn't been taken already, here are a few spare porn handles that no one has claimed yet. Help yourself:

Him

Baron Wasteland

8,477.646882

Commando Shorty

Uri-table Bowelsyndrome

Chef Boyareyouhung

Manboob Incel

Her

Suckagawea

Miyuzi Wazaton

Slut N. Pepper

Captcha Password

Gillian Seabass

Jenn O. Cide

Here Are Your Job Numbers For Week of July 20, 2018

From: Jesse Banfort
To: All
Sent: Tuesday, June 20, 2018
Subject: This week's job numbers

Hey there all. This is Jesse B (not Jessie D from shipping!) with this week's job numbers for your timesheet entry.

Please note that these numbers are different from last week's and that you cannot copy/paste your entries from then. Copy/paste on a work computer can compromise the security of your workstation. Please remember and thank you!


Search: LEZ PORN GIFS

Job numbers: 

474890: Wishin'

474891: Hopin'

474892: Thinkin'

474893: Prayin'

474894: Plannin'

4748905: Dreamin' his kisses to start

992368: Inviting Donna to the "gun show"

605511: Having awkward conversation with the IT guy while he de-frags your computer or whatever

023452: Trying to find a more original phrase than "poop chute"

592284: Correcting someone's "Pinky and the Brain" quote

299003: Being the badass to print out Internet recipes on COMPANY PAPER

028499: "Creating buzz" about your dick

868541: Leaving goddamned red ribbons everywhere

420499: Cutting a tight enough hole in some foam board to fuck

102271: Dividing your consolidated debt back into many small irritating debts

700989: Putting on your "good" Tevas for tonight's date

Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week Of August 1

Twitter can suck my balls. But before it does, please use these seldom-needed hashtags in your Twitter feed:

#penguintits

#2cheeksandhope

#afurryatDisneyland

#jeffdunhamapologist

#Flintstonefoodfetish

#BigDaddyTimKaine

#ithoughtiknewCPRohwell

#asideofC.ThomasHowellyounevergettosee

#spreadmywingsandgetajobatmydad'soffice

#goldencorralsaladbarmissedconnections