Monday, April 2, 2018

Here Are Your Timesheets For April 2018




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From: Haarun Shalhoub <haarun.shalhoub@delirass.com>
Subject: Times Seets Rminder
Date: Tuesday, April 2, 2018, 5:26 PM


Hello this is Haarun from the deli downstairs in the building

Your boss told me to send out reminder of times sheets being the due at E.O.D. (end of day) today

Here are the job numbers incase you required to use them thank you:


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54315: Shitting me

54315b: Not shitting me

29929: Fostering a hostile work environment

024433: Explaining how the "Cloverfield Cinematic Universe" isn't just a catch-all handle for a bunch of different bullshit

68228: Accidentally using Grindr instead of Flickr

92753: Spitting gum into the urinal like an asshole

28828: Spoiling the season premiere of "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt"

81123: Scolding the dog for acting like a dog

936669: Trying to remember if Ezra Miller is an actor or a singer

752013: Praying the gay back

649002: Mustering the courage to call someone handicapped an asshole (and they were being one)

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