The ProofrEADJer: Mid August Edition

A couple in this grab bag:

The ProofrEADJer: Almost Halloween Edition

This week: several people have trouble spelling "cashew:"

An Open Letter To Pinto Beans

Hi Pinto Beans,

I've never written a letter to you before. Not sure why I'm writing now. I guess I just wanted to check in with you, making sure you're okay. We've known each other for decades now, and the truth is, you and I never talk.

And why is that? It's not like we've lost touch with each other. I often see you at Chipotle or at any taco truck in Austin, TX.

Yes, I know you're busy. Both of us are, believe me! But it's good to just touch base and catch up so we don't lose track of each other.

Okay, I'll come clean now. Full disclosure. I was just wondering if you somehow knew "Slumdog Millionaire" actress Freida Pinto. I sure would like to meet her- she's gorgeous.

Can you hook a brother up?

An Imagined Conversation

"Hey, you in the bright green spandex and the fanny pack– you can't roller skate in the post office. Can't you read the sign?"

"These aren't roller skates, man. They're way better; they're the coolest new invention."

"But you're skating around the floor of this post office like an asshole and scuffing up my floors. If that ain't roller skating, I don't know what is."

"Listen, man. These things are in-line skates, or 'roller blades.' See how all four wheels are in a row under my foot rather than like a skate? This allows me to travel a lot faster, plus they look cooool!"

"You look like a bobsled with legs. You look like a right asshole. And you're ruining my tile floor."

"Hey, it doesn't say on your front door 'NO ROLLER BLADES,' man, so I can do what I want!"

The Bulletin Board At The Midtown Five Guys Burger Place Is Interesting