This Week In Hip Hop Awfulness

 

Amerie is naked at the JC Penney Portrait Studio.

Hand puppets + marionette strings + Brady Bunch grid = Almost total confusion

Ew.

Ew. Again.

Maybe try digging the underwear out of your ass beforehand, eh?

I don't know either of these two gentlemen, but I imagine they wasted a million dollars in their effort.

WTH. Fine. As is.

Some mixtape covers are better left blank.

Is that shaving cream? Stuffing? Semen? Bubbles? Fuck it– pass.

UAG

The EADJ Fashion Roundup: Spring Collection

Some families color-coordinatedly roll out of bed.

The guy's hairstyle is divided like a pie chart.

Camouflage hides the shame of Burger King.

God, grant me the patience not to reach over and adjust that man's collar for him, because it's driving me crazy.

Imagine working your entire life to come to America, only to be greeted by a bunch of citizens who dress like they don't give a shit.

My friend Michelle thought this guy's outfit made him look like Santa out of the corner of her eye. I agree.

Pathmarky Mark & The Funky Bunch

Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week of September 25

Twitter is what happens when you give a million attention whores a megaphone. But even they have standards when it comes to hashtags. The following are hashtags considered so dumb, awful or vapid that even the least discriminating tweeters would refuse to use these:

#smurftraitor

#pissingoregano

#monistat7drones

#Breitbartretractions

#beigeLamborghini

#steaksaucelollipops

#TeddyRuxpinweedstash

#ElvisPresleybrandtoilets

#pissandvinegarandFresca

The ProofrEADJer: Midsummer Night's Edition

A Few More Unused, Terrible Porn Names

Okay, so you've run away from home, quit your job at Qdoba, packed two tank tops and a tube of toothpaste in a gym bag and jumped on a Greyhound to the Valley to make it big as an adult film star. But you forgot two important things: your dental dam and a marketable PORNSTAR NAME!

Well, we at EADJ are here to provide you with a name you can be proud of as you either ejaculate on a stranger or have a stranger ejaculate on you. Here are two helpful lists (hers and his) that you can consider for your next big break in the biz:

HER:

Urethra Franklin (courtesy of Emily Kane)

Ureter Moreno

Sarah Draftinhere

Tits Romney

Pisstina Applegape

Humpkin Spice Twattay

Anna Tomicallycorrect

Phyllis Holerighthere

Alluva Cox

Lilly Hammered

Betty Cumsfirst

HIM:

Junk Dilla

Tucker Boner

Jack Kinghoff Yurdad

Takina Dumpf

Insurance Claude

Jean-Michele Scrota

Pvt. Partz

Phil Anderer

Otto Correct

Bruce D. Ego

Reck Tal

Darius Fucker