Wednesday, February 9, 2022

Some Upcoming Conspiracy Theories On InfoWars


The scribes at InfoWars continue to crank out an endless stream of half-baked, unconfirmed, and plain batshit crazy conspiracy stories for Alex Jones to belch out on the air. Here are some stories that will hit the airwaves soon:

• The cheese in crackers in cheese snack packs is expended plutonium from past nuclear tests

• Miss Cleo predicted the housing bubble of 2008

• Tiddlywinks is of the Devil

• Your mother and I have an announcement to make

• Democrats are trying to use "votes" in "elections" to gain positions in government

• Creamed spinach is neither in the produce aisle NOR the dairy section. WHAT THE FUCK

• Amber says she likes you

• So-called green initiatives are actually secret recruitment methods by eco-terrorists to indoctrinate young people into suicide bombing corporations using explosive pine cones

• There are no Belgian embassies in Belgium

• CNN is operated almost entirely remotely by zebra centaurs on Neptune

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