So you've switched from cigarettes to e-cigarettes. Great. But hold on there, buster. That doesn't necessarily make you a Renaissance man or even someone slightly more urbane. That makes you a douchebag. Here now is a guide to show you how much of a d-bag you are with your e-cigs (rated on scale from 1 to 10, with 10 being most douchey):
Arguing with a waitress that it's not a real cigarette and that you're entitled to smoke it at the diner: 8
Tapping the ash off of it "out of habit:" 7
Making some lame joke about fellating C-3PO: 4
Claiming this is your way of quitting: 3
Referring to them as "vapes:" 10
Shitting on traditional cigarette smokers for how backwards they all are: 6
Doing some prop comedy with a lighter: 3
Pulling an e-cig after sex to show how "with it" you are: 90
Waiting desperately for a cop to stop them and ask what that is they're smoking: 5
Liking and joining a "Vapes" Facebook Group:" 4
Whipping out a vape at the MMA tournament: 1000
Working and tilling the earth with nothing but the breeze to your back and a vape in your mouth: 1
No comments:
Post a Comment