Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Apologies and Regrets


"I regret that I have but one dick to eat for my country." - Nathan Hale Thomas

This writer regrets that he did not get to meet with the eponymous Joel in L.A. this week due to scheduling problems. So Joel, consider this entry a heartfelt, written apology:

Hey Joel,

I'm really sorry that we didn't get to have lunch when I was out there. It's my fault, because I somehow let time slip by the 12 days I was in town. And don't think I was honestly avoiding you; I truly was looking forward to seeing you eat dick in person. It's just that I was too busy with work.

To only hear about you eating dick secondhand is not doing you justice. It's unfair to you to report all the dicks you've eaten without seeing it all happen with my own eyes. That's just bad journalism. And this is probably stating the obvious, but I wanted to assure you that whenever I'm in L.A. again, I want to see you eat dick the way I should have these last two weeks. In person.

I hope you can find it in your heart to eat a dick, Joel.

David

(pictured above, Corny clowning around + Unfortunate cropping = Gay porn)

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