Despite having the pants sued off of him for promoting previous conspiracy theories, Alex Jones continues to spread new dubious stories that his audience just EATS UP like Skoal flavored jerky. Here are the latest that he's planning to release into the air:
• Every democrat in Congress is actually an android piloted by hamsters. Extremely LIBERAL hamsters.
• No one ever purchased anything from a Sharper Image store when they were around because none of the merchandise was ever really for sale. The stores were actually mini CIA branch offices.
• The new plastic trays in packages of OREOS are actually shaped differently to make room for surveillance listening equipment underneath.
• Those machines in women's bathrooms that give out free tampons? Communism.
• Due to inflation, you now have to say "Blood Mary" in the mirror 4 times instead of 3 for her to show up. Damn Biden administration!
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