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Another List of Things That Are Cuter Than Ariana Grande

Pop phenom Ariana Grande isn't content with selling millions of records– she also doing everything in her considerable power to let you to know that she's the cutest thing since sliced baby bread. With all due respect, here is a list of things that happen to be objectively cuter than Ms. Grande:

• pizza cutters shaped like the Starship Enterprise

• Slow moving bears

• The word "curlicue"

• The way Nick Offerman giggles

• dwarf furniture

• glitter glue on a kitten's paws

• The paragraph symbol (aka pilcrow) : ¶

• Charlyne Yi

• The way dogs look like they're smiling when they pant

• Elementary school drinking fountains

• Steven Mnuchin's gorgeous actress wife (just kidding. She SUCKS)

• Custard

UAG

Overheard At The Moody Blues Barber Shop

"Morning."
"Hey there. Take a seat."
"Thanks."
"Okay, so what'll it be?"
(looks at Moody Blues poster)
"I was thinking something between a Lodge and a Thomas."
"What, in length?"
"Yeah. Just basically a medium trim off the top, but part it like a Hayward."
"You realize we don't have a Thomas anymore. Haven't since 2002 when Ray Thomas retired."
"That's too bad. I really like the way the sides are layered and brushed back."
"You can still get that. I can just do an Edge with a shorter length."
"You can do that?"
"Sure. I can do anything in Your Wildest Dreams, right?"
"That's corny."