Thursday, July 8, 2010

An Imagined Conversation



"Hey Bow Wow."
"Hey T-Pain. What's going on?"
"Not much. Listen, you know how both of us are starring in this upcoming movie 'Lottery Ticket?'"
"We are?"
"I know. I've never heard of it, either. But take a look at the movie poster. Take a good look at the credits at the top."
"Okay."
"You notice anything about it?"
"No. Just that I'm first. Ha ha!"
"Yeah, good for you and all that. But listen, Lil' Bow Wow.."
"HEY. It's JUST Bow Wow now."
"Sorry. Bow Wow, look how everyone has their first name, then their last name gets blown up in bigger letters."
"Yeah? So?"
"Well, look at my name. Mine's ALL big. Ice CUBE. Bow WOW. Mike EPPS. And mine's just T-PAIN, not T-PAIN."
"Wait. How were those two different?"
"The first time I said 'T,' it was in lower case. The second time I said it in bold upper case."
"No, you didn't. You said T-PAIN the same way twice."
"Well, shit. Forget how I said it; it would look different on the poster."
"Oh. Okay."
"My point is, my name's been reduced to a single word, like Cher, Madonna, or Prince."
"That doesn't sound like a bad thing, man. That makes you an icon. Hey, wait; maybe what you could do is put your rap name in quotes, like Curtis '50 Cent' Jackson or Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges when you're acting."
"My real name's Faheem Rasheed Najm."
"T-Pain it is, then."

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