Monday, December 19, 2022

More Whack-a-Doo Conspiracy Theories From The O.G. Maniac


Tons of right wing podcasters, bloggers, cable TV pundits, and even members of Congress spewing all manner of crazy conservative conspiracies now, but let's not forget that Alex Jones is the original "gay frog" bullshit dispenser. Here are some NEW conspiracies that he and his talented writers are cooking up for you:

• TikTok is actual cancer cells, digitized into 1's and 0's to infect tweens and dumb people

• People used to care that Jimmy Crack Corn, back when there were REAL Americans

• Screaming directly into someone's asshole discourages polyps

• Rapper Flo Rida is personally responsible for all the fluoride in city water

• Restaurant hosts have all agreed to MAKE WHITE PEOPLE WAIT LONGER THAN MINORITIES

• AA batteries carry the same charge as C batteries but are more expensive because conspiracy

• That weed you lost? I took it.

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