"Whoa!"

I somehow came across this Hallmark movie: Socked In For Christmas, starring Joey Lawrence:

What the hell is "socked in"? Is that a stocking pun? Is it something I should look up in Urban Dictionary (answer: NO)? I had to look it up:

Oh, okay. I also found out the producers of the movie gave it an alternate title for slow people unfamiliar with WWII lingo like me:

Snow-In makes a little more sense, although it still sounds like a telethon. IMDb says it stars and was written by someone named Melina Alves. I don't know who that is, so I googled it, and THIS came up:

WHOA! INDEED

A Baffling Tie-In

Spotted at Walgreens, a poster for... uh... What is this poster for?

It's not selling any merchandise that ties in with the release of "Freakier Friday". The poster is placed at the front of the store, not next to anything in particular. And the copy just reads:

From mundane Mondays to freakier Fridays, we got you.

Whether you're 18, 80 or somewhere in between, Walgreens is here to help.

We're for Women.

What the hell? Disney just gave Walgreens money to display a super vague, half-assed movie mention in the hope that somebody who needed lip balm or their diuretic medication sees it and immedately wants to watch the movie? We're they hoping their target audience would be like, "I was gonna grab some M&Ms, VO5 shampoo and a bedpan, but now that you mention it, I think I'm going to see the Lindsey Lohan/Jamie Lee Curtis long awaited sequel 'FREAKIER FRIDAY' in theatres now!"

Could someone in marketing please explain this to me? thx

BONUS Semi-related segment:

I saw this photo on Facebook and my dumb geek ass briefly thought Jamie Lee Curtis was standing in an R2D2 body.

UAG

Quick Wh•re Test

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Let's Turn a Jeans Sales Display Into Sequential Storytelling!

I was bored at the Levi's Store while my sons were shopping, and I spotted four posters on one wall and figured, What if that was somehow a comic strip-style story?

Here's a close up of the posters. And here we go:

Toby was feeling pretty happy and carefree.

But then his needy sister Charlotte stopped him and they started wondering what they were going to do for dinner.

Toby realized they didn't have any money.

But luckily their friend Cade had a roll of quarters and they ate Funyuns from the vending machine!

The end. I didn't say it was a good sequential story.

Still In Business!

Although Bed Bath and Beyond has closed most of their stores nationwide, their website continues to show that they're still affordable and essential for today's shoppers.

Should I Be Worried?

 Pictured below, a kidnapper is on his way to pick me up:

Everyone Needs a Side Hustle

Pictured above, former First Lady Michelle Obama makes some extra cash modeling for Airbuds.

It's Time To Say Goodbye To Stuff Marketers Want Us To Say Goodbye To!

Begone! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!

 

A Public Service Announcement (EADJ PSA)

ATTENTION: Don‘t fall for the Harp’s Tarps fake news! Almost all of their coverage skews heavily toward a pro-tarp agenda, suppressing any alternative views toward canvas coverings or indoor storage.

Smecial Dreams Entry: Celebrity Edition

UAG

Schedule Changes To VidCon 2025

The industry's biggest meet up of influencers, podcasters and content creators is almost upon us. But due to unforeseen circumstances, the schedule of speakers has been changed. Those of you who have purchased tickets for particular speakers should check the updated line up for particulars:

• The OnlyFans workshop has been switched with the Labubu Modesty Brigade

• The aspiring Instagram boy band Hartz-4-U has been disbanded and rehired as maintenance workers

• Reaction vlogger Ju See Dat will not be standing by the women's bathroom reacting to whoever comes out as he had announced

• The Elon Musk Stan Podcast will be broadcasting from Hall D, not Hall E. 

• Unsigned rapper VinylPussy will be signing his demo tapes for $500 and selling branded hoodies for $1200 each

Autumn Leaf Was Ready For Halloween.

Autumn Leaf was ready for Halloween.

Other Leaves just smirked and looked fabulous.

And Another Leaf just seemed confused.

Bonus: Two Leaves show their love! ❤️

Memorable Lines From Movies I Haven't Seen

"Out of the way, lady! We've got a nuclear showdown in international waters to get to!"

"You know, we won't need a bigger boat after all."

(Some version of a terrible "icicle/icy kill" pun)

"EWWWW! Quick, does anyone have hand sanitizer?"

"You missed. You missed again. Nope, missed. Missed again. Missed. Another miss. Are you even aiming?"

The Horror That Is Public Domain

As of Jan. 1, 2024, the original Mickey Mouse from the 1928 cartoon film Steamboat Willie became public domain. And like lots of other properties that lost their copyright, Mickey was quickly turned into a horror movie:

Why is this always the inevitable fate of old cartoons? Do filmmakers still think this is edgy and hilarious? Are people even going to a theatre to see these? Your guess is as good as mine.

(I think the most enjoyable thing about these is reading the corny taglines on the movie posters.)

UAG

Don't Shop on Amazon if You Can Help It

But if you have to, make sure you order groceries on Amazon Fresh. Otherwise you're buying from some random seller and get it shipped like this in the mail: