Yeah, Baby, Yeah!

 Spotted in a church bulletin: a local realtor is one set of bad teeth away from Shagadelic, baby!

"Oh behave!"

Bloodbaths at Big Box Stores?

I was at Walmart and spotted this blood spill kit near the entrance:

I automatically thought of the unruly and sometimes violent Walmart customers I see in online videos. Are fights that lead to bloodshed really so common in Walmart that they have to set up a station for it?

Then a few days later I spotted the same type thing at Target, except it's behind the registers:

Who are these walking blood bags that explode at Walmart and Target? Are stab victims stopping by to pick up a few things on the way to the ER? Maybe that's why they make employees wear red at Target.

Next time you shop at either of these places, know that if you suddenly puncture your femoral artery, they'll be able to clean it up.