The ProofrEADJer: March Edition

Here Are The Shows That Are Being Removed And Added To Hulu This Month

Not to be outdone by Netflix's constant useless announcements of which shows and movies are being removed and added every month, Hulu has announced their latest announcement of which shows and movies are being removed and added every month. Here are the latest shows and movies that are being removed and added to and from Hulu this month:

To be added this month:

• Cackle House

• Spoonful of Rage

• The entire Agent Cody Banks saga, starring Frankie Muniz

• Behind The Agent: The Making of the Entire Agent Cody Banks Saga

• Titslappaz

• Green Eggs and Copyright Infringement

• Busta Rhymes Reads Chinese People's Names

• Let's Eat Dirt

To be removed this month:

• Jiffy Lube Wars

• So I Married A Totally Normal Guy And We're Doing Great

• Shitwillow Acres

• Comparing The Size of My Balls To Various Produce

• Gingham Poppers

• INDICTMENT: The Trials of Sacha Ortiz

• The Glenn Beck Story, starring a bowling pin with glasses

• JPEG, the Movie

Let There Be Racist Appliances And Let It Begin With Me

UAG

The ProofrEADJer, Augustus Augustus Edition

The ProofrEADJer & The Case of the Missing T, E, I, T, C, and the Swapped A For an E.

EADJ Presents: How To Green A Business

As businesses continue to go greener in order to make customers think they give a shit about the environment, EADJ has compiled a few tips for business owners so that they too can go green:

• Make double-sided copies of your ass instead of single-sided.

• If a business meeting is within walking distance, take a nice walk there instead of calling in drunk.

• Lots of companies have gone paperless with their sexual harassment complaints. You should do that, too, Sugar Tits.

• Turn off lights when they're not in use. Since your business is pretty much failing, it's probably better to just turn everything off.

• When someone sends you an email that at the bottom tells you to "reconsider the environment when printing this email," print it out TWICE, show it to them, and tell them to suck it.

• If she is available, you should hire actress Eva Green as a receptionist. Not only is her last name 'green,' but you can totally see her bush in the movie "The Dreamers."

• Think twice before letting millions of gallons of oil leak into the Gulf of Mexico, permanently damaging the ecosystem and generally being a defiant, unapologetic prick about the whole thing (BP only).

• Compact fluorescent bulbs use about 75% less energy than a traditional incandescent bulb and lasts at least 6 times longer. They'll probably be around longer than even you, Mister Shows-Up-At-10:30.

• Styrofoam is no longer acceptable packing material for packages. Try ham.

• They say Eileen's insufferable "Ei-Day" daily newsletters was a waste of paper and told her to stop. Thank God for that.

• Used coffee grounds from the break room can be recycled as fresh coffee grounds for the interns' break room.

• Using a digital projector during presentations spends an awful lot of electricity. Try keeping your slides to a maximum of one.

• Unplug your computer when in use.

• Try biking to work instead of taking the train or driving. This should increase your commute by about six hours a day!

• When tossing your personal assistant's salad, take a minute to think about what you can do to save the environment.

• Energy, unfortunately, is not equal to time. So you still have to attend all those status meetings.

• Quit your job. Join a commune. Grow hashish and just fucking be.

And Now, Vince's Uncle Roberto with How To Peel a Potato

Clean the potato. Hold the potato in your non-writing hand by its sides. Grip the knife handle in your writing hand, blade facing you. Curl your fingers around the handle, but not your thumb. Rest your thumb against the potato for stability. Pull the knife toward you slowly, skimming the potato skin layer off as you go. You must work carefully, maintaining complete control over the knife so as not to cut your other hand. Continue the process, rotating the vegetable to achieve the best angles for potato skin removal.

And speaking of skin removal, any of you ladies in your twenties who are spending money on chemical peels and exfoliants and whatnot, don't. I've driven quite a lot of rich girls going to senior prom who will look like leather wallets later in life. So I'm telling you, you'll regret it later in life. Just saying.

A Recycular Argument

So, let's say you're this big bottled water company selling "high end" water that's better than other water because yours comes from Fiji, and your sales have plummeted recently because people are realizing that paying extra for your brand is doubly bad for the environment because of how much plastic you use to make bottles and how much fuel it takes to ship your special water all the way from a tropical island, but then some marketing guy says you should ride this "going green" wave and somehow perversely exploit this trend to further promote your earth-killing water by running lots of billboards and setting up a website that boasts that you've measured your own carbon footprint and displays your goal of using 20% less packaging by 2010 and exploring WIND to help power your goddamn bottling plants. Good job, asshole.

Mini Off Brand T.P. Roundup!

It was recently discovered that Toucan Cleric's Fun has changed their brand of toilet paper in the bathroom. The new brand is named "Hillyard Green Select."

What makes it greener? Well, it's flimsier, more brittle paper, so that should break down faster in the elements (or in your ass). It also feels like you're wiping with a recycled pizza box, so there's that.

It's just too bad that Toucan Cleric's Fun is thinking so much about going green lately, when in fact its bathrooms are the worst polluted places on earth:

Let's Make An Illegal Copy of the EADJ Mail Sack and Sell It On the Street!

(a helpful hint submitted by my brother Jay, who's an engineer for Ford: that little arrow next to the gas tank icon on your dashboard points to which side your gas tank is on!)

Pop Quiz

One is a public bathroom at an Exxon station on the New Jersey Turnpike. The other is a bathroom at an office building at an advertising agency in Manhattan. Which would you rather use?

More entries from Brad Harvey's notebook!

The following are entries in Brad Harvey's notebook/journal. EADJ got their hands on it when Brad got up to take a dump in The Caribou Coffee on Michigan Ave. Employees reported later that he forgot to flush.

• New idea for reality show: film a bunch of people living together and generally just bitching about stupid shit. Tentative title: Remnants of the Coccyx

• Finish that ear of corn behind the futon

• What was the name of that guy who played B.A. Baracus in "The A Team?" Gotta go to the library and look it up...

• I should totally buy the domain http://http://.com! I could make like a hundred dollars!!

• Start using inverted parentheses, just to be different!

• Remember Wesley Snipes' words of advice about who to bet on next time I'm at the roulette table at The Grand Victoria Riverboat Casino on the scenic Fox River, just east of Route 31 in Elgin.

• Confront Ryan about those farting parties he keeps throwing in my cube. No, wait. That's ME! )Confront Ryan anyway(

• Return that pretty girl's neck brace. She probably needs it.

• Fried chicken and okra! That's the best!

• Ask doctor why pee is green and gravy-like lately

• Get LAID!!! )stop by ATM first(