The ProofrEADJer: Early December Edition

The ProofrEADJer: Early August Edition

The ProofrEADJer: Midmarch Edition

The ProofrEADJer: End of February Edition

Today's EADJ Sponsor: Stan Kay Realty

Do you need to rent office space but can't stand the smell of high rents and outrageous finders fees?

Then, call the Stan Kay Team and breathe in the fresh air of upfront fees and negotiable rents!

What smells like excellent communication? STAN KAY!

What smells like local market knowledge? STAN KAY!

What smells like detail oriented paperwork? STAN KAY!

When it comes to hiring local realtors, don't just get down and dirty. Get STANKAY!

Ummmmm...

 Amazon advertises a felony machine:

Someone on FB sells a bunch of local misdemeanors:

Spotted in South Orange, NJ

A lab for dummies, apparently.

EADJ: Where Are They Now? Entry 3

Last week at WWE Friday Night SmackDown, wrestler Joey "Cheese" Arepas introduced his cousin Gustavo "Yellow Corn" Arepas during a match with The Crucible Crew. Both destroyed the crew within two minutes and claimed the Middleweight title.

At a press conference this morning, NASA announced that respected astrophysicist and engineer Doble Fibra will spearhead their new robotic lunar rover next year. Fibra did not take any questions but declared that "the new era of terrestrial exploration has begun."

Pop stars Lorde, Charlie XCX and Chappell Roan have announced a collab with newcomer Kale Detox. The super group will release an EP in November along with a tour of limited engagements. Detox has said she's "thrilled" to share the stage with such legends. Lana Del Rey has expressed interest in producing. 

San Diego police have finally captured Solo Basura, the suspect allegedly responsible for smuggling methamphetamine worth $450K that was found hidden in crates full of tomatillos. Lawyers for Basura have denied any involvement and reiterate his innocence.

Former "Baywatch" actor Chag Sameach was involved in a scuffle at an autograph signing convention when an overeager fan put him in a headlock during a selfie. Using his mixed martial arts training, Sameach body-slammed the fan and threw him off the second floor area into a fountain. The fan has yet to press charges.

The ProofrEADJer: End of June Edition

What do you call a chicken without any I's?

Please do not push Michael Buble.

Spotted In South Orange

An event space for people who want it catered by the Little Rascals: 

The ProofrEADJer: April Edition

An Imagined Conversation

"And here's our new in-store display! Do you like it?"

"..."

"What?"

"Did you recently watch 'Thelma and Louise'?"

"What? No. Why would you ask..."

"Two women wearing sunglasses in a convertible. That doesn't look like 'Thelma and Louise' to you?"

"Well, I can see the resemblance, now that you mention it, but..."

"We can't have our customers buying our Daily Intimate Wash and then driving off a cliff, Samantha."

"I don't think anyone is going to see this poster and..."

"'Let's just keep going, Thelma!'"

"Oh Christ. Okay, I'll change it."

A Staggeringly Terrible Choice For a Visual

Someone picked the absolute worst image for this sign's message. 🦠

A Copywriter Gets Too Clever For an In-Store Sign at CVS

"Strive to underachieve." Meaning, try to have a cold for less than 7 to 10 days.

So a roundabout way to say take better care of yourself. 

So buying CVS cold relief products will help you "underachieve" compared to duration of the average cold.

WHY AM I SPENDING SO MUCH TIME ON THIS SIGN THAT NOBODY READS?

Confused

A sign spotted in South Orange, NJ:

"BANS OF FOUR BODIES?" What?

The ProofrEADJer: End of September Edition

The ProofrEADJer: Early February Edition