Happy Independence Day from Eat a Dick Joel!

To all the Independent Women (and Men) Pt. 1, we at EADJ wish you a happy and safe July 4.

Fun random factoid:

In Destiny’s Child's 1999 song “Independent Women Pt. 1” for the Charlie’s Angels soundtrack, during the bridge, they’re actually singing the melody to Blondie’s “Rapture”. 

Bridge starts at 2:55

Synopses For Upcoming Episodes of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

"Injustices"

Charlie is forced to confront his own racism when he makes a broad statement about tan people being subhuman. A runaway from Olivetown reveals they are the mayor's illegitimate daughter and throws the upcoming election in turmoil. An unsolved murder remains unsolved.

"Dual Loyalties"

Charlie arranges a meeting of all the Colorforms City gang leadership, only to find out it was a trap set by the police. A hidden camera in a motel room becomes an instant moneymaker for Charlie. Colorforms women lose the right to vote.

"Down, Motherfucker"

Joshua and Ellie help kids learn how to count to 20. Drug lords in the Purple Pink neighborhood take over the surrounding suburb turf and expand their distribution. A train yard murder reveals an entire population of C.H.U.D.s living under Colorform City.

Synopses For New Episodes of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

"Caveat Emptor"

Charlie's gambling addiction is revealed to his common-law wife, who leaves him immediately. His step-sister comforts him sexually.

"Within, Without"

The Purple Town Hustlaz clash violently with the Green Side Apostles, and Commissioner Lavender is forced to call in the National (Color) Guard. Rumors of a dirty bomb in the train yard forces loading crews to evacuate. College students start falling sick from a "puce-colored STD".

"Forcible Removal"

Red religious zealots burn down the Gray Community Center. Charlie and his kid deputies raid an opium den in Color Wheel Park and uncover an immigrant trafficking ring. Gerry euthanizes Hue the Police Horse after it shatters its leg in a dressage event.

UAG

Synopses For Upcoming Episodes of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

"Impasse"

Charlie's fake elector scheme falls apart. The Tan Council approves the demolition of the Pink Projects. The Colorforms crime rate skyrockets when the Purple Police go on strike.

"Decisions"

The Colorforms City power grid is compromised by Monochrome Terrorists. New districts are gerrymandered so that the Yellow Party stays in power. Charlie cuts off his deadbeat brother.

"Shit You Not"

Orange and Red neighbors realize they're not so different after all, but the Oranges will never forgive Reds for the damage to their property. Charlie meets with some Saudi investors to finance the Colorforms light rail. A Green sweatshop goes up in flames at the same time a nearby luxury apartment complex is announced.

Synopses For Upcoming Episodes of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

"Alliances"

The City Council forces Charlie out of the Main Square Planning Committee when they discover his connection with the hired contractors. He plans his revenge. Casey and Darla find boxes of discarded ballots, a week after the mayoral election.

"ad Astra per Aspera"

The assassination of a state senator causes a citywide lockdown. Charlie and his black tar heroin supplier need to find an escape before the police discover their stash. The local school's Color Art Show begins.

"Vengeance"

A series of small time crooks are found stripped and murdered, but luckily Charlie has an alibi when he's locked up for fighting at the Colorforms Blue Casino. Rainbow Johnny ghosts his probation officer again.

Synopses For Upcoming Episodes of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

"Questions"

A body found in the Colorforms River Basin turns out to be Mayor Blue's missing wife. Charlie bribes a health inspector so the Rainbow Eats Festival can move forward.

"Destination"

City official Purple is kidnapped in an Uber. Charlie confronts his ex-wife about her not honoring joint custody of the children. A thunderstorm threatens the Tie Dye Workshop.

"Answers"

Inmates escape from Colorforms Penitentiary. Charlie busts an opium den in the Cyan District. The gang war between the Reds and the Yellows ends when they form the Oranges.

Some Unanswered Plot Questions from Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City", Season 2

Of all the colorful neighborhoods in Colorforms City, why do visitors go to the Red Light District first?

Is the informant that ratted out Charlie's meth operation still alive?

How did Milo smuggle gun parts into the prison?

Will Mayor Sunbeam's history of human trafficking affect his chances at reelection?

Is that your dog?

Has the Colorforms gang war with Shrinky Dink City gotten worse? 

Synopses For Upcoming Episodes of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

"Countdown"

When a blogger threatens to attack a school, it's up to Charlie and his pals to hunt him down and kill him.

"Territory"

Charlie confronts a drug dealer who says he "accidentally" started dealing on his turf. A new mob boss requests a meeting with Charlie's friend Tugboat.

"Keyless Entry"

Charlie's ties to the Russian mob almost disqualify him from receiving a key to Coloforms City from the mayor. Luckily, he pays off the city council and the ceremony goes forward.

"Extra Extra!"

The bodies of several prostitutes end up near the Colorforms factory and the local paper threatens to break the story. Charlie makes it all go away by threatening the journalists' families.

More Episode Summaries of Netflix's "Charlie's Colorforms City"

Season 2, Episode 1: Casey and Franklin discover crates of stolen goods in the back of Charlie's home. He bribes them some of it to keep them silent, then makes plans to move the merchandise to a safer spot.

Season 2, Episode 2: Charlie's sister and mother fly in to visit him from Vancouver, but he doesn't want to see them. He stays away and doesn't answer his phone until they give up and fly back home.

Season 2, Episode 3: Too many gambling debts forces a mob enforcer to pay Charlie a visit. After breaking his kneecaps, wrists, hip, and shoulder blades, the goon leads in a song about honoring promises.

Season 2, Episode 4: Dana and Lily discover that Charlie has been playing them both as girlfriends. Neither is willing to admit that they are the source of HPV.

Season 2, Episode 5: Charlie steals from an old folks home and justifies it by saying it was a memory care facility and no one there realizes anything's missing anyway.

Upcoming Episode Summaries From the Netflix Show "Charlie's Colorforms City"

Episode 1: Gabe and Hank meet the new next door Charlie, a being made of Colorforms who's on probation for an undisclosed crime.

Episode 2: Charlie teaches Gabe and Hank how to huff paint when there's no meth handy. Hank's mother is suddenly pregnant.

Episode 3: Every dog in the neighborhood goes missing. Charlie frequents a new nearby brothel.

Episode 4: Charlie's drug empire expands as he recruits Gabe and Hank as low-level lieutenants. Hank murders who he thinks is a competitor's drug mule.

Episode 5: Charlie tries to find a way to make pancakes for all his hungry friends. Star comes down from the sky to play but needs help when she gets stuck.