Things Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex and Meghan Markle, Duchess of Sussex Talk About

• How Grandpa looks silly in that crown

• What tell-all books they could write, now that both of them have already told all in tell-all books

• What's new on Netflix

• How things were different shooting on Hallmark Movie sets, but different in a good way

• Where to store these polo boots in this lousy 2 bedroom apartment

• If being a Duke or Duchess expedites hiring at Walmart

• Who farted

Join Us As We Say Goodbye To All The Shit That Marketers Want Us To Say Goodbye To

Goodbye! Goodbye! Bye-bye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Bye!

This Week In Hip Hop Awfulness

The local theatre production of "Lawrence of Arabia" tried their best with the budget they had.

Two former students harmlessly exact revenge on their alma mater using one bootleg copy of Photoshop and photos of a fireplace fire.

Later, Residence Inn employees were baffled by the baby oil footprints on the 8th floor.

This is actually really well done. No changes!

Mom's curlers + Mom's blue bedsheets + flashlight = GANGSTA MIXTAPE!

We all love the smell of our own farts, don't we?

"School crosswalks LOL!"

There was a mixup at the printer, and they ended up putting the paper *protecting* the artwork on the scanner. Whoopsie!

George would rather wait hours for his party to show up than lose the deposit on his Houston's Steakhouse reservation.

Choose the wrong typeface and you end up on the cover of "The Crap Tribune."

A Work Of Art

Spotted in South Orange, New Jersey, this exquisite outdoor sculpture of unknown origin.


What's interesting about this soaring, monumental piece is that it seems the bright, solid opposite of a grave and strikes at the whole definition of sculpture right away. It does not suggest flight or the ability to fly or even movement, but rather it plays the role of intermediary between the sky and the earth. The solid, consistent mass of the base holds it to the earth by the force of gravity. Art critics are instantly reminded of the bold organic lines of Alexander Calder's La Grande Voile or Merete Rasmussen's clear, clean curves.


This sculpture can be viewed in front of Cleanway Car Wash, where you can get a brushless carwash, interior detailing job, hubcap waxing, and floor mat laundering for only $29.99. SUVs are $5 extra.

Bathing in a Brooklyn Basement

As I was moving boxes in the basement of my Brooklyn apartment, I discovered a once-used miniature shower.


It was a little more than 5' high, with a tiny slanted tile floor...


...and a small pipe without a shower head. It was claustrophobic and looked like it was baked from adobe.


Bizarro. It looks tiny enough only for Twikki, Emmanuel Lewis or David Spade.

Answers To Yesterday's "Which Can, Erickson?"

Click to enlarge. Cuz I'm sure as hell not going to type all that again.

It Is Time Once Again To Play "Which Can, Erickson?"

This time, we have so many toilets so instead of using the standard A,B,C: 1,2,3 format, we're going to use Zodiac signs and the names of Star Trek alien races.


Match the toilet in the photo with one of the following:

Bajorans: Whitney Museum, NYC
Vulcans: Boucher Funeral Home, Deptford NJ
Romulans: Hotel Victor, Miami Beach
Borg: Detroit Airport
Klingons: Hooters, Charlotte NC
Tholians: University City United Methodist Church, Charlotte NC
Ferengi: Strand Bookstore, NYC
Betazoids: Gerald R Ford Museum, Grand Rapids, MI
Talosians: Toucan Cleric's Fun
Jem'Hadar: Pittsburgh Airport
Cardassians: Tom's Restaurant, NYC
Andorians: Fresh Works Sandwich Shop, Audubon, NJ

The answers will be posted tomorrow. Good luck, and have fun!