Block Tech Presents: GALACTIC WARS!

Many eons ago in a very distant universe...

GALACTIC WARS: Episode IV: Another Chance

The universe is ravaged by local skirmishes. A courageous group of guerrillas rises to resist the overwhelming UNIVERSAL DYNASTY.

Attacking from a secret base hidden somewhere in the universe, flying space fighters have won their first success in a conflict with the strong Monarchical Armada. The DYNASTY is afraid that one more failure could recruit a thousand more systems into the insurrection, and Monarchical control over the universe would be forever gone.

To crush the insurrectionists once and for all, the DYNASTY is building an evil new war fortress. Strong enough to obliterate a whole planet, its realization bodes poorly for the champions of freedom...

This Week in Hip Hop Awfulness

 

A bit literal, aren't we?

JPEGMAFIA is always wonderfully weird. Or weirdly wonderful.

Yes, this is a real mixtape cover. A++++

The opposite of leg warmers.

It's so weird that I know exactly who that is from the drawing.

A note: mixtape covers with a goat on it saying you're the GOAT is no longer original. If everyone is the GOAT, NO ONE IS.

Whattaya Say We Say Goodbye To Stuff Like Marketers Want Us To?

Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! *kiss* (figuratively) Goodbye!

Sci-Fi I Haven't Watched

Based purely on the screenshots, Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda is about a group of physically fit space travelers who do nothing but give each other the silent treatment.

Coming Soon To The EADJ Crappinema: "Humanity's End"

The last two crap movies we reviewed were a children's movie ("Gooby") and a comedy ("The Suburbans"), so it was time we did a sci-fi flick, and here it is: "Humanity's End," starring Nobody and Nobody, and introducing Nobody as Nobody.

EADJ's "Blackberry Face" Series Grows

It is with great pleasure that EADJ announces a fourth addition to the fine art photography showcased in its East Wing, namely its "Blackberry Face" series.

"Sam" joins "Maggie," "Frank," and "Tony" to become the second minority and the first African American work in the permanent collection.


A refreshing departure from the interior locale of a commuter train, "Sam" opens up a whole new world with sidewalks, signage and even other people in the background. Also, the skewed composition of the shot breaks from the formal portraiture format to become more accessible and approachable to the viewer. A tension between secrecy and openness is apparent for the first time, breathing new vitality into the series and redefining what a "Blackberry Face" can be.


The gallery, anticipating a new rush of viewers, will now be open early at 8am Mon-Thurs, (excluding holidays) at the Kunst Room at the McGrath/Jensen Library. Visitors are invited to see the series in its chronological order, although the gallery space does allow for roaming.


:C

CRAWLSPACE!!!!

My cousin Melissa and I were cleaning the basement in my house, and we found a CRAWLSPACE near the bathroom! Inside we found a bunch of treasures that were left by the previous owner, who you might remember left a ton of crap in the yard and an upstairs closet.

I let Melissa go in first, in case there were mummies or waterfalls like in "The Goonies."



The crawlspace had low head clearance (thus the name) and we found a shitty brass lamp, an unknown bracket, and what looked like a dusty tennis racket case.


We found an ancient mystical box that was labeled "Killauni."


No magical amulets or idols inside, though.


Although if the previous owner's motorcycle GPS goes haywire, he's screwed.


We found a perfectly good desk fan, which I gave to Melissa.


Then we found THIS:


Friggin' JACKPOT. A rusty fucking sword! This IS the Goonies!! We also spotted an unattractive flower vase and ignored it.


We cracked open the tennis racket case to see what was really in there.


It was a camping cot. Was someone actually sleeping in this crawlspace? Did this used to be some kind of sex dungeon? Was "Killauni" involved?


We also found a cassette tape, the contents of which I hope to digitize and post on this blog later. But after that whole abandoned film fiasco, let's not get our hopes up too much.


But even if it turns out to be a blank tape that was inexplicably left played in the middle, we'll always have THIS:


Lost Boys!!!!!

EADJ Smecial Dreams Entry

From time to time EADJ asks its readers what dreams they've had lately. Here are some recent ones:

Andrew:
i did dream that i opened the refrigerator and there were oven knobs in there

Lorraine:
like me, marty and brad pitt (who was telling us what to do) were like serial killers
he was our boss
i was scared

David:
I dreamt that a quick growing rat was running through the office and every time someone spotted it, it was bigger.

Tom W: