Comic Strip Where The Last Panel Is Always A Remote Oil Rig

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Things To Talk About While Sitting At the Little Tikes Fold 'n Store Picnic Table With Market Umbrella

So your parents bought a Little Tikes Fold 'n Store Picnic Table With Market Umbrella for the backyard and have invited some people over. You're expected to have lunch or a snack at this thing and worse yet, probably expected to have a conversation with the other kids sitting there. EADJ and Little Tikes have joined together to give you some possible ice breakers and discussion topics:

• Are Capri Suns fruit boxes?

• Paw Patrol is grooming children to accept fascism

• Why do training pants seldom have trains on them?

• Eating your vegetables: A LIBERAL CONSPIRACY

• What foods are there besides pizza?

• Is Caillou a bitch, or is he a TOTAL bitch?

• The dangers of not picking your boogers

• That cloud that looks like a frog never mind

• Why hasn't Trump fired Dr. Fauci yet if he dislikes him so much?

• Can one enjoy Fat Albert and The Brown Horne without the shadow of Bill Cosby's awful legacy?

• Words that rhyme with butt 

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And Yet More Puddles of NYC, Identified by Pantone Number

The island of Manhattan is teeming with vibrant colors and bursting with bodily fluids. Here we document what you almost stepped in before the winter weather freezes everything to shit:

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The EADJ Crappinema Presents The Casino Job

Let me start off by warning you that this review might be a wee tad shorter than other Crappinema write-ups, mainly because the DVD to this movie had been damaged after being tossed about in the K-Mart cutout bin. The disc caused the movie to crash and skip entire key scenes throughout its viewing. And no, one of those "DVD Scratch Repair Kits" wouldn't help, either.

"The Casino Job" is the story of four attractive women Jennifer, Amber, Paradise and Torri (and their boyfriends) who pull off a huge heist in a Vegas casino using only the power of their boobs and their feminine wiles. Which includes boobs. Witty dialogue? No. Magnificent scenic vistas? Nope. Boobs? HEY, BUDDY, YOU'RE IN LUCK!!!!

The following is verbatim dialogue from this scene:

Her: Shit! That's a waste of two days.

Him: He's out. No pun intended.

Him: So what do you got going on for the next 12 hours?

Her: Why?

Him: Cuz, I think maybe you could come over for a little while.

Her: And do what?

Him: Well, I was just… you could just…

Her: How about… twenty minutes of foreplay, followed by some hard sweaty fucking… I'll start by getting down on my knees and taking off your pants…

H

im: (removing his sunglasses) Shut up. Just shut up.

(She looks confused)

Him: You had me at hard sweaty fucking.

(they kiss stupidly)

Well, shit. This was a formatting nightmare.

Overall grade: F

Still, tits.