The ProofrEADJer: November Edition

Stay in school, kids.

Update: New Perks To AMC Stubs Membership!

AMC is adding even more benefits to its already successful Stubs membership program that both new and existing cardholders can enjoy. Here are the latest:

• If you walk out of a movie because it's terrible, we will loudly beg you to stay

• Free popcorn with a little too much garlic in it. You can ask for less garlic, but we will always put just a little too much in there for you.

• Regardless of what movie is playing, you're allowed to insist that "Paddington 2" was way better.

• Free AMC Stubs Jibbitz pin to put on your Crocs, you disheveled slob of a human.

• The Stubs card is now razor sharp for you to throw and kill someone with (in AMC theatres only)

Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week of May 5

Social media is the perfect way to share shit that nobody asked for. Whether it's Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, LinkedIn, Google Plus (LOL), or Snapchat, you can broadcast the dumbest fucking nonsense to the widest swath of idiots in the time it takes for you to squeeze one off in the john. Here now are the least used hashtags that you can use in your next social media "blast:"

#papalthong

#subwaysoup

#camerareadyart

#ATATtainttattoo

#CSPANorgasms

#treygowdyshirtless

#TEDTalkatWalmart

#spencersgiftsregistry

#anthonykiedisbeautifulvoice

#makingmynipplesshakehands

#jellydonutfilledwithbloodplasma

Comic Strip Where The Last Panel Is Always A Remote Oil Rig

Always always always means always.

:'(

Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week of September 15

LEAST used hashtags. Least used.

#NFLheroes

#bangerzonvinyl

#hangingwithISIS

#dickcheneynipnips

#theoutfieldreuniontour

#walmartpowerwalking

#andersoncooperinathong

#DMXchildrensbookswhat

#sometimesimsoproudofmylabia

#spendingqualitytimewithkimjong

#icancumactualpancakebatterjustwatch

#ineverfoundjoanriversorrobinwilliamsthatfunny

#myhighschoolprincipaloncetoucheddickswithmeandwespooned

Spotted On The Highway

A health brochure from the local free clinic passes me on the parkway.

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