Here Are The Shows That Are Being Removed And Added To Netflix This Month

Every so often, Netflix renews or cancels shows and movies based on an algorithm viewer preferences. Here now are all the shows that will be added to Netflix this month:

• I'm A Celebrity! Get Me Out of This Podcast!

• What We Do In the Shadows Is None of Your Business

• Blue Brother (Blue Bloods meets Big Brother)

• The View: Deathmatch

• Extreme Botched: The Headless

Here are the shows and movies that Netflix is removing from their lineup this month:

• Joe Rogan Sleeping

• The Bold and the Marginally Attractive

• America's Got Talent: Unamerican Edition

• Pawn De Replay

• Dahmer: Open To Dating Again

Say Goodbye To More Bullshit That Advertisers Need You To Say Goodbye To!

 

Goodbye! Goodbye! 👋 Goodbye! Goodbye!

Question

"The Perfect Race"? Do they mean white?

More Available But Frickin' Awful Porn Names

Congrats on your Sassy Dark Enterprises! Before we start shooting with this here iPhone 13 Max, you'll need to pick a porn name -something you’ll go by at porn conventions and cell phone repair store grand openings. Here's an empty dildo box full of porn names that you can pick from. Help yourself to any of it, but fair warning– these are pretty stupid:

Him

Alan Rench

Anal Alda

Johnny Cum Rapely

P.P. Inyertwat

Rim Tintin

Her

Allovia Chest

Pudenda Gushalott

Norma Lee Notintothistypeofthing

Tuesday Muffins

Annette Flix Original

Dog Park Missed Connections

The following Missed Connections were posted by dogs that visited the Bucks County Core Creek Dog Park in Langhorne, PA:

You: the Yorkshire Terrier with a limp

Me: the Malamute with the green leash harness

Hey, hot stuff! I noticed you looking my way over at the weird tunnel thing that no one ever enters. Wanna grab a bowl of water sometime? I'm spayed! Wink wink

You: the Balto-looking Husky

Me: the pale Golden Retriever

I know my breed catches flak for being overly friendly, but you seemed pretty cool and I thought we could hit it off over some Snausages and a fine merlot. Call me?

You: the grey pit bull terrier puppy

Me: the Dachshund puppy

IT WAS SO NICE TO MEET YOU! THE DOG PARK IS THE GREATEST!!! I THINK WE GOT ALONG GREAT!!! WE SHOULD BE BESTIES!!!! I FEEL LIKE YOU ARE MY BFFF ALREADY!!!!! SEE YOU SOON!!!!

You: Mr. Handsome showing off his new nail grind

Me: the Laso Apsa (I keep forgetting how to spell it!)

I feel like we really hit it off when you had mounted me and your owner pulled you off before you actually penetrated me. See you around, hopefully!

The ProofrEADJer: December Edition

The ProofrEADJer: After Christmas Edition

Say It Ain't So, I Will Not Go, Turn Pathmark Off, Carry Me Home

And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Pathmark Merchandise

UAG

An Imagined Conversation

"Hi. Welcome to CVS."
"Hello, I'd like to return a gift."
"Sure. The Discovery Kids Eco-Friendly Color Me Rocketship?"
"Yes."
"Was the toy not to your satisfaction, ma'am?"
"Not so much that. I didn't actually open it."
"Oh. Then what is the problem? It can't be the color. You have to color it yourself!"
"Ha ha. No, it's not that. It's just that I realized I'd purchased a twenty dollar box."
"Well, it's more than that, ma'am. Look here on the front. It 'provides endless hours of imaginative play.' It features a 'crawl-thru porthole.' It measures 5 feet long, sets up quickly, and is made from recycled materials."
"It's a box."
"Sure, but it's whatever your child would like it to be."
"Uh huh. And why did they even bother packaging it in another box?"
"I don't know, ma'am. I don't work for Discovery Kids."
"A box in another box. Who's to say the box it comes in doesn't also provide 'endless hours of imaginative play?'"
"Who says it doesn't?"
"Are you getting smart with me (reads nametag), Gordon?"
"I don't think so, ma'am."
"Just give me my twenty dollars back."
(gives money back)
"Thanks. Now, where's your dumpster, Gordon? I need a box about yay big."