Showing posts with label piece of chicken as head. Show all posts
Showing posts with label piece of chicken as head. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 7, 2023

Today We Asked A Man With His Head Squeezed Between A Woman's Thighs To Explain YouTube Copyright Strikes

"This is a great question, especially if you're a content creator on YouTube. Copyright strikes happens when someone claims that you’ve used their work without permission. Uh, this includes... ah... ouch... video clips, music, or... I can't... various text excerpts... GAG.

When a... *gulp*  copyright removal request is... Lordy...  submitted to YouTube... ow ow ow ow... they review it... hey hey hey hey... And if the removal request is... choke... valid, they remove your video to comply with copyright law." *windpipe collapses, dies*

Monday, November 17, 2014

How To Consult the I Ching Using A Chick-Fil-A Catering Menu


If you ever find yourself in a Chick-Fil-A in need of some sort of ancient oracle to answer a vital life question, look no further than Chick-Fil-A's own catering menu!



You'll find that the platters have been arranged in such a way to correspond with some of the many trigram configurations found in the original I Ching: The Book of Changes. So cast your three coins, ask a spiritual question, and look for the answer, courtesy of the Home of the Original Chicken Sandwich!


Chick-Fil-A Nuggets Tray = QIAN (Heaven)

The Chick-Fil-A Nuggets Tray represents the YANG energy of the universe: the Father, Sun and Fire Element. It also comes with cheesy ranch dressing for dipping.


Chick-Fil-A Chicken Salad Sandwich Tray = LI (Fire)

The Chick-Fil-A Chicken Salad Sandwich Tray can refer to the fire of the human mind and to the fire of the mind of Tao. The fire of the human mind refers to the many desires and emotions that veil the Original Spirit. This does not imply that the chicken salad within is spicy in any way.


Chick-Fil-A Chicken Cool Wrap Tray = KUN (Earth)

The Chick-Fil-A Chicken Cool Wrap Tray is the YIN to the YANG of the Chick-Fil-A Nuggets Tray. The Chick-Fil-A Nuggets Tray is firm and the Chick-Fil-A Chicken Cool Wrap Tray is yielding, They are fitted to embrace each other. They also go well together for corporate outings.


Chick-Fil-A Cool Wrap and Chicken Salad Sandwich Tray = KAN (Water)

Although the original I Ching never combined the parts of the YIN and YANG to create KAN, the Chick-Fil-A Cool Wrap and Chicken Salad Sandwich Tray resembled the configuration of the glyphs most closely. Turns out the KAN has its own complementing opposite: LI, represented by the Chick-Fil-A Chicken Salad Sandwich Tray, although the Chick-Fil-A Chicken Salad Sandwich Tray is half represented in KAN, which doesn't make any sense. Jesus, this whole thing really falls apart...


Chick-Fil-A Chick-N-Strips Tray = DUI (Lake)

Pass.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

RUN!

(pictured below, Gambino terrorizes a small neighborhood in the Bronx)


Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Hecka-Breaking News!


In some sort of cosmic synchronicity, two separate doppelganger spottings have been reported today.

Flicklicker saw "a less brown, less confused looking, more fauxhawked version of Vince in the Michigan Plaza lobby" and reported it to EADJ authorities.

Then Matt Webb chimed in after coming across our original Shorter Fatter Version of Scott Peterson:

"Just had a sfvosp sighting... Jeans, green striped shirt and MANDLES, oh with socks."

Stay tuned for the latest in these developing stories. We now return you to "She Spies" on TNT, already in progress.

(pictured above, the best rendition of the SFVOSP that I could make, given that I had no drawing tools or scanner handy and was in the middle of eating a chicken caesar salad)

*****HECKA-BREAKING UPDATE:******

Andrew has reported a third doppelganger at Cramer-Krasselt: "we have a shorter, younger, darker-haired, just-as-friendly Phil Flickinger working as an intern. We just went to lunch with him."