Today We Asked A Man With His Head Squeezed Between A Woman's Thighs To Explain YouTube Copyright Strikes

"This is a great question, especially if you're a content creator on YouTube. Copyright strikes happens when someone claims that you’ve used their work without permission. Uh, this includes... ah... ouch... video clips, music, or... I can't... various text excerpts... GAG.

When a... *gulp*  copyright removal request is... Lordy...  submitted to YouTube... ow ow ow ow... they review it... hey hey hey hey... And if the removal request is... choke... valid, they remove your video to comply with copyright law." *windpipe collapses, dies*

Andrew Dice Clay Is Still Doing It

The following are transcribed from a January performance at the Funny Bone Comedy Club in Omaha City, Nebraska:

"Yankee Doodle came to town
riding on a pony,
stuck a feather in some chick's pussy
and she got toxic shock syndrome! Ooooohhhhhhhhh!"

"This little piggy went to market,
this little piggy stayed home,
this little piggy had roast beef,
and this little piggy ate some broad out in a Port-a-John and got Hepatitis C! Boom! UnbeLIEVABLE!"

"Hey Diddle Diddle...
Chris Hansen from Dateline NBC would like to you to sit right over there! Let me tell ya, ShabbadabbaDOOM!"

"Little Bo Peep, lost her sheep,
and didn't know where to find them.
Hey, bitch, who told you to leave the kitchen in the first place? Go make me a sandwich, because you're a woman, and you're supposed to do those things! Ooooohhhhhhhhh!"

"There was an old woman who lived in a shoe,
she had so many children, she didn't know what to do.
I know what you can do, lady. You should keep your legs crossed from now on, because you obviously are promiscuous and should be ostracized for being sexually active, because we men have a double standard when it comes to sexual behavior like that! Am I right, fellas? Boom! Helllll yeah!"

"Twinkle Twinkle Little Star,
why am I obscure now, but other shitty comedians like Dane Cook and Larry The Cable Guy are literally filling up stadiums? Ooooohhhhhhhhh!"

UAG

Andrew Eats A Rolly Wrap

Editor's Note: Two weeks ago, Andrew in Seattle read the now-famous Rolly Wrap write-up and requested one of his own. Last week, EADJ sent him one via FedEx. He ate it over the weekend, and here are his words and photos:

The plan to consume my day-plus old Rolly Wrap was a well-executed strategy. As I returned from a shopping trip with my fiance Saturday afternoon, I found myself weak with hunger. It was the perfect time. I opened the Fed Ex to find my Munch Boli wrap in decent shape, considering the cross-country journey. I popped the wrap in the microwave for :45, sat down, opened a bag of Harvest Cheddar Sun Chips as a supplement, and went to work.







In short, the Munch Boli was great. I ate every bite in less than 10 minutes, all told. The peppers kept it flavorful, and the meat inside didn't seem harmed from the long journey. The marinara sauce was also excellent.

I found myself satiated and quite happy for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. I didn't throw up, shart, or cramp. And when none of those things happen, I can confidently deem my meal a rousing success. Thanks, Munch Boli. My curiosity is piqued and my stomach, satisfied. -Andrew

EDITOR'S FOLLOW-UP: For eating meat that had been unrefrigerated for over 24 hours, Andrew receives the very first EADJ Smecial Polonium Mollusk Award as indicated at the bottom of this blog. Also, bonus points for rocking a Transformers t-shirt.

SFVOSP Addendum

After writing an entry whose main thrust was about the SFVOSP's footwear, it seemed a little silly not to include that detail in the drawing. So Andrew drew this: