The ProofrEADJer: May Edition

Newest Rewards Added to the AMC Stubs Program

AMC Theatres are retaining their moviegoing customers with their hugely successful Stubs membership program. A yearly subscription gets you plenty of in-theatre perks, and the list is constantly growing. Here are the latest new benefits of signing up:

• 5 extra minutes of trailers to movies you have no intention of seeing

• Raisinets / Goobers exchange program

• A promise not to have someone with huge hair sit in front of you

• If you're suffering from hemorrhoids, we will scrunch up a bag of popcorn into one o' those donut cushions for you

• First dibs on a special Lady Sybil Crawley edition Downton Abbey popcorn bucket 

• Special glasses that make it look like you're watching a movie at home rather than with a bunch of random losers

Some More Memorable Lines From Movies I Haven't Watched

"This won't work out. We're not compatible. You're obviously USB-C while I'm USB-A!"

"What was it you said earlier, that this job would get off without a hitch? Well, Sarah, guess what this is. That's right. A HITCH! This job is definitely getting off WITH a hitch, Sarah! You hear me? I signed up for a HITCHLESS job and we now have ourselves a HITCHFUL job, Sarah!"

"Hello. My name is Andrew Tate."

"It's your turn to change him."

"Goddammit."

"This high up, you can't possibly expect there to be a working shower."

"Be Faithful in Small Things Because It Is In Them That Your Pathmark Lies."

Let's Rest Our Gangrenous Leg On Top of the EADJ Mail Sack!

 Submitted by Pat Ng: 

"It doesn’t seem like the winning team practices workplace safety."