Fiverr Delivers Again

Thanks to Fiverr seller broadcastking for this exclusive EADJ puppet rap video.

A Very Special Video Segment of Taglines For "Avalanche Sharks," Featuring Phil and The Puppet Non-Juan

Thanks to Fiverr seller apt1982 for creating this video for us:

Shitty Movie Unsolicited Tagline Dreamworld

Here are more un-asked for tag lines for the movie "Avalanche Sharks," now playing on some channel on your cable box. Probably Discovery or History Channel. Maybe Spike? Fuck.

Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Go Back To The Avalanche...

More bad taglines for a bad movie which I've never seen. Yet.

Coming Soon To A Theatre Near You: "Avalanche Sharks!"

Hot on the "success" of the Asylum's straight-to-video movie "Sharknado," some studio named Titan releases their own preposterous disaster movie with "Avalanche Sharks." It's interesting to note that Titan executives decided to abandon the shark/weather formula for a shark/natural disaster storyline. It's taking these type of wild risks that make a Hollywood studio so bleeding edge and a nurturing garden for originality.

Here's the trailer for the thing:



And once again, EADJ offers their tagline services for the movie poster:

Sharks!

UAG

"In The Nude," Part 2 of an ongoing series

(The following is the second entry of a new occasional series by guest writer Joe Nudelman – don't laugh.)

"Avalanches Blow"

Avalanches: The Very Loud Killer… The Distinctly Audible Killer… okay… The Ridiculously Loud Killer. Screaming is often met with the unspeakable experience of withstanding the wrath of the mountains. As scary as such an occurrence may be, screaming at the horrific sight will only inspire more deadly, snow covered, carnage to rain upon your otherwise totally awesome Spring Break party weekend with totally hot babes skiing in two pieces for apparently no reason, and you’ve got to out-ski the opposing camp for rule of the slopes!

Avalanches have claimed 484 fatalities upon the American populous since 1985, these natural disasters are not to be confused with the recording artist ‘The Avalanches’ (note the ‘s’ denoting plural). These guys are totally decent musicians, if you like that sort of thing.

Now come on, 484 fatalities is nothing. 484!? Please. I’ve racked up at least 539 on Mortal Kombat. Granted those are compounded numbers following the entirety of the video game series, and greatly serve as evidence of an otherwise unfulfilling childhood. But nonetheless those numbers still impress. What is even more is that Mortal Kombat SUCKED! I mean seriously, why would you play a 2D fighting game where you have to press a stupid button to block? Really!?

Street Fighter was a WAAAAY better series, that kicked as much ass as Blanka beating the crap out of Chun-Li (I remember her being a lot hotter)

No stupid buttons for blocking in this game, just hold the back direction. The game series was also a whole lot better than that stupid movie, which will unfortunately stand forever as the last work of totally decent actor Raul Julia.

In short, Avalanches may SEEM big and scary, but don’t fret too much. I’m really good at video games and Avalanches don’t scare me a lick.

Catch y’all on the flip! –Joe Nudelman