Shém On You, Hermés!

Spotted in Beverly Hills (don't ask), in front of the Hermés Store (again, don't ask):


A luxury brand reveals its ties to Nazism:




For shame, Hermés! I shall never again spend $4000 on your Black Vache Liegee Leather Paris Bombay Bag! You Nazi fuckers!

Bonus: That there is Kyle S. checking his email in front of the store like it ain't no thang.

An Open Letter To Andrea Bocelli

Hey Man,

Thanks for the newspaper. I had no idea you and me both shared an interest in New Jersey local news and politics. I just assumed since you were a world-renowned opera tenor and the biggest-selling solo artist in the history of classical music, that you wouldn't care about The League of Municipalities convention where they'll debate over a property tax cap or Rutgers coach Greg Schiano's struggles after getting the Scarlet Knights tied for last place in the Big East. Who knew?

I mean, when you sang the part of Canio in Ruggero Leoncavallo's Pagliacci back in 2007, I had no idea you would one day be gladdened like I was at Governor Chris Christie patching up his sometimes rocky relationship with the New Jersey Chamber of Commerce ever since they strongly supported his then-opponent incumbent Jon Corzine!

Thanks again for for the paper, Andre. It has a lot of old articles about Artie Lang selling his Hoboken home and all, but the Sudoku is pretty fresh.

Keep On Peddling, George

Mere days after a recent entry about George Lucas' relentless merchandizing of Star Wars, this cub reporter actually got to go to LUCASFILM STUDIOS in San Francisco, courtesy of his good friend Pat.

And along with all the historic awesome props, maquette sculptures and matte paintings from famous movies, OF COURSE there was a gift shop on the premises. With an ATM nearby.


And along with the videogames, t-shirts, hoodies, mugs, cups, action figures, DVDs, books, towels, caps, necklaces, notebooks, pencils, pens, backpacks, sunglasses, posters, wristwatches, bracelets, sweatshirts, baseball caps, stocking caps, coffee cups, water bottles, fleece jackets, and children's books, they also sold wine. Yes, wine.


"Viandante Del Cielo." Get it? Skywalker.


See, it's not crass because it's in Spanish.

Here is a semi-serious review of the actual wine.

Penis And Vagina Mugs Found In Jersey Shed

So I found these two beauties in the backyard toolshed sometime last year- yet another treasure left by the previous homeowner.


And while Andrew (while visiting us) was impressed by them, here is J'Net's reaction to the aforementioned items:



Meanwhile, in the shitty movie "Land Of The Lost:"

Yeeks.

So recently on Facebook, I friended a former classmate from high school, and 99.99% of her profile photos are this:


And not just pictures of Betty Boop, but very sexualized pictures of Betty Boop.


If you're wondering if this person really resembles a super-leggy Playboy model with a head as large as a beer cooler, you're wrong. She's fat.

Proof I'm Going To Die In A Cab

The Return of Racist Appliances