Showing posts with label smog lube wash. Show all posts
Showing posts with label smog lube wash. Show all posts

Friday, July 5, 2024

Gallery Review of Two Unknown Paintings at the Jiffy Lube Waiting Area in Vauxhall, New Jersey


While awaiting the oil change for a Honda Odyssey minivan, I happened upon two companion works of art displayed above the empty "free coffee" area of the room. Now, initially it seems counterintuitive to display such pieces in a corner of the room, seeing how much white space there is under the TV, but upon closer inspection, it seems to be the most ideal place to feature these striking pieces.


"Untitled 1"

Nestled in the corner—almost flush in the crease—is the first untitled piece. Evoking the balance and organic geometry of Paul Klee or Rothko, this composition commands the limited space it inhabits with its grounded white, offset by the muted blues and black. The olive shape at the left almost is almost bestial, suggesting a bear on its hind legs.


"Untitled 2"

Playing with the same general whites and blues as its companion, this piece lands in a similar but ultimately different place: the sturdy whites still dominate the canvas but are sharper in their definition and at the same time are more translucent when overlapping the darker colors. The smudge of pink at the top center reminds us the same value was present but possibly ignored or overlooked in "Untitled 1". The blues and darker tones have become more dominant here, providing a solid foothold at the top and bottom to contain the white. It invokes a night sky that soothes and comforts... oh wait. They just said my car is ready. Gotta go!


Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week Of August 1


Twitter can suck my balls. But before it does, please use these seldom-needed hashtags in your Twitter feed:

#penguintits
#2cheeksandhope
#afurryatDisneyland
#jeffdunhamapologist
#Flintstonefoodfetish
#BigDaddyTimKaine
#ithoughtiknewCPRohwell
#asideofC.ThomasHowellyounevergettosee
#spreadmywingsandgetajobatmydad'soffice
#goldencorralsaladbarmissedconnections

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week Of July 2


The following are hashtags that have been sitting around the garage collecting dust, because no one wants to use them in their (still stupid) Tweets. Feel free to add any of these to your Twitter ramblings:

#nipplehairperm
#lululemonlalaloopsy
#trivago.com
#HDbirthvideo
#malalaisoverrated
#smithsonianpussy
#invitroorgasms
#cathoardermakeovers
#lastnightadjshavedmywife
#rihannaclothed
#barbarabushbeatboxing

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Another Joel Angel Update

In case any of you were wondering where Joel's video of doing Criss Angel magic tricks is, Joel has assured us that he's working on it.

It turns out that Joel has recently come into possession of a full carwash with his wife. So they have been busy on the up-keep, maintenance and general operation of the carwash. Those of you who watch the excellent show "Breaking Bad" might suspect that Joel is secretly selling meth.

As a token of good faith, Joel has sent us this magic trick "teaser:"



I do believe Joel might have gotten run over by a car after filming this.