Bush Was Bothered

Bush was bothered.

Carry On Luggage was outraged.

Upside Down Parking Space Car thought it was hilarious.

Electric Mower was not impressed.

Cement Mixer Nozzle continued being EVIL. 💀

UAG

When I Say "Racist," You Say "Appliances!" "Racist!"

UAG

Here's An Untested Pet Theory

Theory: All advertisements for shitty reality shows must contain at least one person folding their arms.

I guess I should have collected a lot more samples to test this theory. Uh, stay tuned to this blog for more, soon.

6 Lies Told By The Capital City Segway Tours Brochure

1) Not everyone who takes these tours looks like the fat version of the cast of "The Walking Dead."

2) Old fart in the background not guaranteed to be there.

3) Day & Night does not mean you can ride your Segway past the White House at 4am, because that shit will get you shot.

4) There's nothing WWII veterans like better than dodging youngsters on newfangled hovercraft wheel-thingies on the sidewalks.

5) "Cold drinks for cheap" means we won't rape you as bad as the Smithsonian commissary will. $6 for a bottled water instead of $7.50.

6) This QR code doesn't actually go the to "www.CitySegwayTours.com." Try it. (click to enlarge)

Feedback Forum

Do you enjoy the "6 Lies Told" series? We'd like to hear from you. The "6 Lies Told" series was created by "Cheers" creators Les Charles, Glen Charles, and James Burrows in 1987 and is now an upcoming original movie on the Hallmark Channel starring Stockard Channing as the number 3. The "6 Lies Told" series also lives as a set of commemorative saucers from the Franklin Mint and will soon be limited-run bears at your local Build-A-Bear Workshop.