The following Missed Connections were posted by dogs that visited the Bucks County Core Creek Dog Park in Langhorne, PA:

You: the Yorkie whose name I forget

Me: the Collie with the human hat

DUDE! We haven't played in forever! It's been so good to catch up! I love your winter coat! Don't be a stranger now, hear?

You: the slinky Doberman

Me: the Bulldog with the underbite (I realize that doesn't narrow it down)

Hello sexy. I saw you looking at me while you were sniffing that German Shepherd. I think maybe you should sniff me sometime?

You: the Dark Chocolate Lab

Me: the French Bulldog with the booties

I was crapping by the water bowls when you walked in. YOU WERE GORGEOUS. Why didn't I talk to you? NEXT TIME BABY.

The Worst Possible Things To Say While Playing the ECR4Kids Jumbo Four-To-Score Giant Game 4-In-A-Row Connect Game

Someone close to you has spent $159.99 plus tax plus shipping for the ECR4Kids Jumbo Four-To-Score Giant Game 4-In-A-Row Connect Game and is now enjoying it in the backyard with you and some others. Here now are maybe the worst possible things you could say at the moment:

• "What the fuck is this? I could've built this for you for like, $20"

• "Connect Four is the copyrighted property of Hasbro Corporation. This large version is an unauthorized use, and I will be contacting their lawyers."

• "I think about four of these could fit on my dick."

• "Have any of you seen that documentary Plandemic online? Very eye opening."

• "You're pretty good at this game, Jeff. When you're not DATE RAPING."

• "These look like donuts. But I probably said that because I'm fat. Nobody loves me. Will any of you love me even though I'm a fat piece of shit who can't hold a relationship down?"

• "No, seriously, I could put about five of these on my dick."

Fiverr Screamer DELIVERS!

Still reeling from the disappointment of Fiverr user Foswaldo's rejection of my request to write an EADJ blog post, I used my credits to order a death metal logo and I even hired this gentleman to scream the lyrics "EAT A DICK JOEL" for 5 bucks. And guess what? He delivered this morning!

Here is him screaming "EAT A DICK JOEL". At least I think it is.

And here is the song I had him scream over. His vocals being at 2:02



And just for yuks, I got him to scream "THANKS FOR NOTHING, FOSWALDO" over a music track of my choice:



HOLY SHIT I LOVE FIVERR NOW 😀😀😀😀

And Fiverr user ethansmith_ is a great guy. Thank you!

More Terrible Taglines For A Movie We All Forgot About (Or Never Heard Of To Begin With)

The ProofrEADJer: End of April Edition

Dut Dut Dut Dut Racist Appliances!