Old Fashioned Sugar Cookies

An Incomplete List of Things Objectively Cuter Than Ariana Grande

In addition to ruling the pop charts for over a decade, Ariana Grande will have you believe she is the cutest thing EVAR. We respectfully disagree with Ms. Grande and instead offer these things that are easily cuter than her:

• Japanese mascots for tissue paper

• Single Chiclets

• Children wearing little cowboy duster coats

• Miniature corn impaled on regular-sized corn cob holders

• A catfish wearing a bonnet

• Travel sized nose hair trimmers

• The Funko Pop figure of Ariana Grande

Some More Available But Dumb Pornstar Names

Welcome to the Valley! We’re about to start shooting your first big scene. But before cameras start rolling, you'll need to have a pornstar name– you know, a unique handle that we can tag your videos with. Here's a stripper heel shoebox full of porn names that you can pick from. Help yourself to any of it, but watch out– a lot of these are pretty stupid:

Him

Luis Goos, Man

Colin Oscopy

R. Kaid 

Philippe Navidad

Yass Queen

Her

Noma Larkey
Grammar Lee
Buenos Diaz

Pupa Moji

Yass Queen