"Never Underestimate the Pathmark of Human Stupidity."

The ProofrEADJer: End of May Edition

Info Wars Presents: Conspiracy Theories FOR KIDS

PragerU has launched programs to indoctrinate children with far right beliefs. Not to be outdone, Info Wars is announcing the following conspiracy theories directly to children:

• Your parents are withholding most of your allowance and giving it to illegals

• Slavery was just a bunch of grown ups playing farmer and boss

• What really sank the Titanic? Drag queens.

• McDonald's McFlurries are delicious because they're made with liberal tears

• Krampus is actually Nancy Pelosi

• Fidget Poppers are a gateway to queer poppers

Caption Contest!

"High five!"

"Holy Trinity Powers, ACTIVATE!" (insert Super Friends sound effect)

"I, state your name..."

From Grant Martin on Facebook: "They look like they're trying to catch a bird that got into their house."

"Raise your hand if you want ice cream!"

"WASSSSUP! Dove in the house!"

And Now, Vince's Uncle Roberto On How To Assemble A Sit 'N Spin

 

1) Remove the 3 screws taped to the top of the base. Use a Phillips screwdriver and the two #6 screws included with the base to connect the turn handle to the top of the center post. The screws connect on the sides of the turn handle as shown (b).

 

2) Place the center post/turn handle into the base as shown. Flip the base over and use the Phillips screwdriver with the single #10 screw (included) to connect the center post/turn handle to the base.

 

 NOTE: Make sure that all assembled parts are securely attached before using the Sit 'n Spin. 

And speaking of "flipping the base over," (and speaking of "screwdriver") one time I had to pick up a couple living on a military base for a formal function. I hadn't even gotten off the base when they just started going at it like two dogs in heat, like in that movie "No Way Out." I gotta tell you– and I mean no disrespect– Marines are crazy. Stay safe, kids.