Twitter's Least Used Hashtags, Week of February 17

Twitter has a lot of hashtags, with lots of uses. To sell shoes, to raise awareness for a debilitating disease, to shame a mother who slapped her daughter in public even though it was a joke and everyone got all bent out of shape and she's not even my real daughter get a life.

Here are some bad, underused hashtags that you can use in your own Twitter feed that no one will read:

#Ozzyhygiene

#shinmediabuy

#telegramsexting

#Doritoscoveredcorpse

#empoweringpeasants

#thanksfortheprettyfistula

#YouTuberswhowerealsoValedictorians

Some Ponderings On That Picture

Since discovering that random photo of that sullen dude in Walgreen's last week, we here at EADJ have agonized over how it got there and its meaning in the universe. We broke into discussion groups, did some serious soul searching, and came up with a few ideas of why the hell that thing ended up there. Here are a few theories from some of America's top scientists:

"I think he's mad somebody threw water at him."
-Liam McCarthy, eight-grader named "America's Top Young Scientist" in the 2010 National Young Scientist Challenge

"In most likelihood, he is a young man who works at Walgreen's who has been promoted by default to a position of management because of a vacancy. The young man's expression reveals his reluctance to take on the tremendous new responsibility of telling someone to open another register when the check-out line gets long. The absence of a name plate near the photo further reinforces my theory of his reluctance."
-Pamela Matson, dean of Stanford University's School of Earth Sciences

"To me, it looks like this is the photo of some guy who bounced too many checks at that Walgreen's, so they posted his photo in a prominent (however random) place to warn others not to do the same. Just look at how profusely he's perspiring."
-Yakir Aharonov, quantum physicist and recipient of the National Medal of Science

"This photo is actually a 'before' promo shot for a store display selling a posture corrective brace. It was misplaced in the store, and an employee mistakenly framed it."
-Venkatraman Ramakrishnan, structural biologist and Nobel laureate

Backhand

Pictured below, it's good to see that Lucky, through all the years, has kept his pimp hand strong.

Slow down, big guy.

Joel is on vacation, so there's not a ton to report on EADJ.

Except that Joel is planning to go on a 4-day dick eating marathon (pun intended!) in the sunny Florida Keys. Nothing but sun, fun, and huge Florida cock bouncing in the back of Joel's thirsty mouth. Joel has already filled his schedule, so anyone in the Key Largo, Islamorada, Marathon or Big Pine Key area who wants their dicks eaten in a hammock is out of luck. Joel will be staying at the luxurious Sugarloaf Lodge in a poolside villa. Look for the red NO VAGINAS sign on his hut!

(pictured above, some of the C-K expensable meals you can have under $7)