"Well, this itches more than I thought it would."
"Psst, what's the Packers/Lions score?"
"Aw man, what did you feed the goat?"
"That drummer boy is really starting to annoy me."
"I just realized that half of us are in a band.""I know they mean well, but it's really distracting when passing cars honk their horns."
"Applebee's."
"I'm doing this for purely political reasons."
"Dude, I don't think a Rottweiler was in Bethlehem."
"Joseph. Stop staring at my chest."
"Does this count as cosplay?"
"Why is the baby black?"
"This manger wasn't built by a competent carpenter, I'll tell you that much."
"How ironic. The Comfort Inn across the street says 'No Vacancy.'"
"Sheeeeeeeeeee-ip."
"Hágame el favor de hablar más despacio."
"This will get me on IMDb, right?"
"Onion bagels? Fucking hell, Tom, I specifically said plain or raisin bagels."
"Okay, who has the air horn?"
"I look good in this."
