Gag

Pictured above, EASILY the most disgusting mobile game ad I've ever had the misfortune to see. Thanks Project Makeover! 🖕

UAG

♫ And The Pathers Gonna Path, Path, Path, Path, Path and The Markers Gonna Mark, Mark, Mark, Mark, Mark... ♫

So How Did "The Suburbans" Do?

The EADJ Crappinuum has always been the most accurate way to gauge how bad a movie is. The mere fact that it appears on this measure indicates that it falls somewhere between "terrible" and "fucking piss-awful."

"The Suburbans" is one of those movies that leans a little more towards just "terrible" because of the following reasons:

• pretty good production values

• a discernible plot

• not terrible performances (except for the director/writer/main actor/caterer)

Everything else is a solid strike against the movie, from being unfunny, unconvincing, poorly paced, to worst of all, wasting the comedic talents of some solid stars. Oh, and a major strike for not getting Jennifer Love Hewitt to flash her snoobs.

Sure Beats "Chink Chink You Stink."

(pictured above, some graffiti in the subway with a level of depth I wasn't prepared for)