Memorable Lines From Movies I Haven't Watched

"Goo goo fuck you."

"Well, Karla, I guess you reap what you sow... in bed."

"Can a Roomba do this?" *takes top off*

"A classic tale of Girl Meets Poi"

"Okay, okay, I confess, Christine. I'm a professional clown. I dress up goofy and spray people in the face with a fake flower. I wear comically oversized shoes and pretend to slip on banana peels that aren't there. I ride around with 60 other clowns in a Mazda Miata, and yes, I do throw pies in people's faces and yes, I can sculpt literally anything out of long, squeaky balloons, but I do know this... I know that I am falling in love with you."

"Well, call me a triceratops, because I'm definitely horny!"

"You’ve Got To Get Up Every Morning With Determination If You’re Going To Go To Bed With Pathmark."

Comic Strip Where The Last Panel Is Always A Remote Oil Rig

At The Office, Just Because Someone Says There's Food In The Kitchen Doesn't Mean It's Good

At least it's no meat?

Twitter's Least Used Hash Tags, Week of January 14

Here are this week's most underused Twitter hash tags (feel free to use on your own Tweets):

#friendster

#yardsaleorgy

#sanduskyapologist

#scarymoviecriterionedition

#idontgetwhatsfunnyaboutalbertpujolsname

#newpagemakertutorial

#chrisklein

#toolshedagedguacamole

#proudofmyonetesticle

#iphotoshoppedmyasstolookthinner

#daihatsucarloan

#nostrilproblems

#whitehousesharter

#mydumbchildren
#iheartcongressionalrepublicans

#lenofunny

#zerodarkthirtymademecum

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