Updated Schedule For VidCon 2023

Social media's biggest "stars" are coming together later this month to VidCon, and tickets are selling like hotcakes! But last minute line-up changes have shifted the featured guest schedule. Here are the newest additions:

• Reaction video star Gakey Wong will be mugging and gawking from the side of the stage without giving credit to whoever is onstage

• As per usual, Yammo and Queediddly will be assaulting and harassing random people, claiming that they're "pranks"

• Anime superstar Hokusansa will be possessing a lucky fan's body to enter the real world

• Justin Bieber will return to his early YouTube roots and will perform a song that nobody watches

• A bunch of manosphere podcasters will appear onstage and start arguing and making out with each other

Am I Crazy...

Or do you see THEN DICK GROW, too?

And Now, Vince's Uncle Roberto On How To Whistle Loud With Your Fingers

Here's how to use your fingers to make a really loud whistle:

1) Press the tips of your thumb and forefinger together (like the “OK” sign).

2) Press the tips of your fingers up against the tip of your tongue and curl your tongue back

3) Squeeze the corners of your mouth hard and tight against your thumb and forefinger.

4) Wrap your lips around your fingers to make as small of an opening as possible.

5) BLOW!

And speaking of blow, this one time a corporate client left about 10 grams of "nose candy" in my limo after I drove him to the airport. It's still in my glove compartment! Shhhhh!

Be safe, kids!

UAG

Today?

No.