Showing posts with label Flex Tape commercial. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Flex Tape commercial. Show all posts

Monday, October 27, 2025

Whitney Houston's Fictional Husband Greg Finally Responds To Her Lyrics from "The Greatest Love Of All"



I believe the children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
how them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be

Wait. You're leaving? When were you going to tell me?! I know we've had some rough patches lately, but you've gone and just abandoned me with the kids all by myself? And when I have that IT conference in Dallas next month? Goddammit.

Everybody's searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone who fulfilled my needs
A lonely place to be
And so I learned to depend on me

Well, our kids need someone to look up to, but I guess it's not going to be their gallivanting mother. Who's going to take Vanessa to softball now when I'm working late? Christ, this is all I need right now, with the merger and upcoming layoffs. I wish you just had an affair like normal people. 

I decided long ago
Never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I'll live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity

No one can take away your dignity. Well, that's just great. Meanwhile the bank is eventually going to take away our house since we have only one income from now on. This is really inconvenient, Whit.

Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all

Oh I see. You've stopped taking your meds, right?

Wednesday, March 24, 2021

More Memorable Lines From Movies I Haven't Watched


"WTF? Are you crazy or something?"
"No, actually, I'm..."


"Bless me, Father, for I have skinned."


"That new girl from Transylvania sucks."


"Blake! These aren't homeowners at all! They... they RENT!"


"Any questions before we continue?"
"Yeah. How come none of our hair is weightless?"


"Ghost ninjas?! Are they even quieter than regular ones?"


"It's over, Bargord. I'm holding the Cursed Gem of Rohm and now wield the power over all of Gatscedia and its undead armies. Now give me the amulet of Vurturr before Pakkaria's army breaks the east wall and conjures the Soul of Teretth'eh!"


"It's my ass. The ultimate weapon is my toned ass."

"Jesus. Are you sure you don't have any pen and paper lying around?"


"Agent Morgan, I'm going to be honest. You really suck at keeping a low profile while on missions."


"I knew I shouldn't have tried a homeopathic cure for my eczema."


"Jeet?"


"Wait. Did I leave my phone in that male stripper's gutted corpse? Shit. We gotta go back."